People Like You
A Stage Play about A Lesbian Alcoholic
by
John A Johnson
Copyright 2011
Smashwords Edition License Notes
ISBN# 978-1-4659-3405-5
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Play Readings & Performance Rights
Plays are not written to be read but performed. So should you subsequently decide to conduct a read-through of the play, additional copies of the script for each of the play's characters can be copied. If you do read or produce this play please notify the author at the address below.
People Like You is a stage play. Names, characters, places, media, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. The author’s personal contact information is:
John A Johnson
1155 Santa Clara Ave Apt A
Alameda, California 94501
510-205-8325 Email: Ptolemy1@aol.com
Bibliography and Biographical information located in the Narration Section at the end of this play.
The Author hopes that you enjoy this presentation about Marty Mann and that you will pass her revolutionary message on to others.
This play takes place between December 1935 and July 1941. The play is in four acts. The end of each scene is demarcated by lights and music although some acts segue into the next without clear definition.
Old songs from the 1920’s and 1930’s are played depending on the mood and abilities of the musician. As the music plays, characters representations are spotlighted. around.
CHARACTERS
Mrs. Marty Mann - Founder National Council on Alcoholism
William Buchler Seabrook - Author of Asylum
Dr. Tiebout - Medical Doctor Patron of Alcoholics Anonymous
Lois Wilson - Bill Wilson’s wife and founder of Alanon.
Bill Wilson - Author and Founder of Alcoholics Anonymous
Act I
Scene I
Northern England Tudor Townhouse, two stories with balconies overlooking courtyard. Courtyard lined with bright colored flowers. It has been raining. Everything is wet. There are benches around the perimeter of the courtyard and four or five street lamps light the surrounding area. Bloomsbury Group Characters are seated around the courtyard circle: Symbols of Gertrude Stein, Pablo Picasso, Ernest Hemmingway, and Thornton Wilder Henri Matisse. Marion Carstairs, Karl Jung clearly reveal their identity. These characters have no speaking parts so they can be manikins. If you are creative and have extras then they can dress in character instead of using models.
Suddenly, from the balcony, center stage, a tall wild woman is shouting and screaming at the top of her lungs. She is waving a large bottle and drinking from it on occasion.
M.M.
What do you mean people like you? You mean me . Do you mean drunks? Or is it lesbians? Or is it just women you don’t like! Some doctor you are. People like you!!!! What does that mean? You’ll see how to deal with people like me.
She goes back into the door off the balcony and just as suddenly comes flying out the door and dives over the balcony, landing face down on the cobblestone courtyard.
Lights dim and it is quiet.
Scene II
Same courtyard, a person is lying on cobble stones. There are several people in white uniforms, doctors, nurses, aids, red emergency lights are flashing in background.
Doctor 1
Mrs.. Mann. Can you hear me.
M.M.
Of course I can hear you. Why would you ask a dumb question like that.
Doctor 2
Mrs.. Mann you have serious injuries and you must lie still and cooperate.
He gives her a sedative injection in the buttocks.
M.M.
What does that mean? Serious injuries! I can get up and walk. Watch me.
She tries to move but cannot. She is paralyzed and cannot get up.
She is lifted onto a stretcher and carried in the direction of the emergency lights. Lights dim. Quiet.
Scene III
Ten days later. Hospital Room. Hospital Bed, tables, bedpans, IV Racks, Oxygen Tanks and Tubes. Marty on the bed with her leg bent and elevated. Doctor seated on front side of bed facing audience. Nurse on back side of bed fitzing around facing the audience.
Doctor 2
Mrs. Mann, do you know where you are?
M.M.
Of course I know where I am. I am in a hospital.
Doctor 2
Do you know how long you have been here?
M.M.
Since last night when I came in.
Doctor 2
Mrs.. Mann you have been here for ten days. You were in a comma. you fell from the second floor balcony and landed on your face. You broke your jaw. You knocked all of your lower teeth out of your head. You broke your hip and you bit off bits of your tongue on both sides. You may be impaired for the rest of your life. I am afraid that you will be here for quite some time. Like it or not. Chances are you may have to use crutches or a wheel chair when you leave here .
Lights fade
Scene IV
Same room now populated with student nurses but a party atmospheres. Party glasses, hats, confetti, stringers. Marty has convinced the young nurses that what she needs is her medicine (alcohol) which has been smuggled in the guise of water in a gallon jug. Marty is dressed in a pantsuit ready for travel. A Bon Voyage banner is has been added to backdrop.
Group Singing
So long, it’s been good to know you, So long it’s been good to know you and a long time that you’ll be gone.
Anonymous One
You are lucky to going to America. There is going to be a big war with Germany and with new Airplanes and Balloons and big guns they will be bombing England. They may even invade our Homeland. A lot of people are going to die. I wish we could all go with you.
Anonymous Two
Maybe you can finish your Great American Novel when you get home. I remember that was why you came to England in the first place.
M.M.
I am not going to get away from the Germans or to work on The Great American Novel, I am going to get away from the booze. I simply cannot leave it alone. Even when I do not want it, I still have to drink. There must be something dreadfully wrong with me. I change from wine to beer and beer to vodka, and vodka to bourbon or gin or tequila. I thought that would change if I left American and moved to Europe but nothing changes. Everywhere I go, there I am. And the doctors. All of these Limy Doctors can tell me is that if I can find out why I drink, they can tell me how to fix it. If I knew the answer to that why I could fix it myself. As soon as I get to New York I am looking for Willy Seabrook. He knows why I drink and I won’t need these doctors. I read his book Asylum and the answer is in his book.
Anonymous Three
What about your family, are they waiting for you in New York?
M.M.
Yes, my mother and my sisters are all there and they will meet me at the boat. We will have a grand reunion and then I will look for Mr. Seabrook. Things will be different, I just know that for sure.
Fading lights, group singing so long it’s been good …….
Act II
America
Scene I
Fourteen days later. Older Woman (M.M’s Mother) and her two sisters standing at the dock watching happy passengers emerge from the large doorway of the ship onto the gangplank waving and crying out to waiting friends and relatives.
Sister A
She said she would be wearing a bright red pant suit with light jacket.. We should see her come through the door any second now.
15 minutes pass.
Sister B
Is it possible that she missed the sailing from England? No we would have heard by wireless had she missed the boat. She probably has so many bags and suitcases that she is waiting for other to go ahead of her. If she doesn’t come soon, we will have to ask the ship’s captain. Maybe she fell ill on ship and cannot walk.
Mother Mann
Oh ! No ! No!, she could not be drunk !!!!!! She promised!
Momentarily two figures emerge from the doorway onto the gangplank. Between them is a stretcher. On the stretcher is Marty. She is singing.
M.M.
God Bless America, Land that I love.
Mother Mann
Take her to Doctors Hospital and sober her up.
Scene II
Doctors Hospital, New York six months later. A blustery restless red-haired man standing near the bed facing the audience.
M.M.
So you are the famous Mr. William Buehler Seabrook.
Seabrook
Yes indeed, I am who you say I am. And I who spent a lot of time in and out of the nut houses. That is the reason I can write about it like I did in Asylum, I know the routine.
M.M.
I am much honored to meet you Mr. S .
Seabrook
We already have a mutual admiration society. I am under the illusion that you came all the way from England to see me.
M.M.
I left America in 1930 because I could not get away from booze here. I had planned to write the Great American Novel while in Europe but I found that I could not stay sober long enough to write. After five or six years I ran out of friends and options so I came home to America to get away from booze but I here I still can’t stay away from it. I could not even stay sober on the ship and when I arrived at the dock, I had to be hauled down the gang plank on a stretcher, into an ambulance and to this very hospital.
Silence
M.M.
In the last year I have had five good jobs but could not stay sober. I just cannot leave the stuff alone. I read your book and got the impression that you are like me and you have had trouble staying sober but now after being in the nut house you are sober. Is that a fact?
The doctors cannot help me. They tell me that they do not know what to do with People Like Me. But I read your book Asylum, which I understand you wrote after living at for seven months behind the walls of the mental hospital where you went for acute alcoholism.
Seabrook
Yes, that is basically true. I am sober now and hope to stay that way. (The following dialogue is adapted from p. 53. Asylum.) So long as any man drinks when he wants to and stops when he wants to, he isn't a drunkard, no matter how much he drinks or how often he falls under the table.
Silence
Seabrook
It is not the drinking that makes the drunkard. I had drunk for years, enthusiastically, and with pleasure, when I wanted to. Then something snapped in me, and I lost control. I had to have it even when I didn't want it. I couldn't stop when I wanted to. Instead of being joyful, it was awful. I went to the nut house because I had lost control when I drink, not because I drink a lot or too much for that matter.
M.M.
But what was wrong with you that you drank like that? Didn’t the doctors pinpoint the problem and fix it so that you would not want to get drunk.
Seabrook
No !! I stopped wanting to get drunk but I still had to drink. That was who I had become. A Drunk. When I went to the nut house in 1934, I was just like the rest of them, nuts. I stayed there for seven months and when I came out sober I wrote the book about it.
M.M.
I would rather die a drunkard than to be locked up in a nut house. Going to my grave would be more acceptable than going to an asylum.
Seabrook
Mrs.. Mann I understand how you feel. I felt that way once myself. Here is what I recommend to you. There are hospitals that admit drunks and help them get sober. These hospitals have charity patients for tax purposes and I suggest that you find one and get yourself admitted, that is if you are serious about getting the monkey off of your back. Are you serious? I hope so !!
M.M.
Yes !! I will do anything, go to any length to find sobriety. Dr. Kennedy says that I have to Stop Drinking Completely Forever. I just want to be normal. He also says I need a job but most of all I need to make a decision to not drink any more, no matter what happens. I think I am crazy but he says no, I have a physical illness and alcohol makes it worse.
Seabrook
That may be true. But the other nutty doctors around here and all over the world all say that if we stop drinking for a period of time, we can return to normal drinking and get on with our lives. I like that idea better than the FOREVER idea.
M.M.
Yea that is what I want. I want to be a normal drinker. I have been here in Doctors for six months and I am dry, will that count? I am going to do whatever I have to do get rid of this drinking too much.
Man in white coat with a stethoscope walks into the room. It is Dr. Kennedy. Marty introduces him to Seabrook
M.M.
Dr Kennedy I want you to meet a man who knows about drinking. I have done my research on alcohol in some of the finest pubs and salons in the world but this man has done even more than me. Willy Seabrook. Willy this is Dr. Foster Kennedy, the doctor I told you about who has told me that I cannot ever drink again.
DR. Kennedy
I am pleased to meet you Mr. Seabrook. I have read your books and Asylum is a powerful argument favoring giving up alcohol once and for all. I have examined Mrs.. Mann and I cannot find any physical maladies.
M.M.
See. I am crazy. What can I do?
DR. Kennedy
I have found an exclusive private psychiatric treatment in Greenwich, Connecticut. They take a few inebriates although there is little hope for them to get over their drinking. Dr Harry Tiebout, MD is a Psychiatrist and he is the Medical Director at Blythewood.
M.M.
I have already met him. He told me that people like me cannot drink at all. I told him that I do not like people who do not drink at all. He does not drink and like all the self-righteous dull, gray do gooder teetotalers are all the same. They have big white teeth. live narrow lives and want everybody to be dull and gloomy like them so they say don’t drink.
DR. Kennedy
Yes I know he is like that but he has been impressed by your intelligence and by your honesty and more than anything else, your earnest desire to stop destructive drinking. Blythewood has an opening for a scholarship for one woman. If you want to go there Marty, you might get some help.
M.M.
I have no other options. I cannot stay here. My family can’t take care of me. My friends have all had it with me. I have no job, no home, no prospects, no money, no self respect, no confidence, no courage, no humanity. I still have pride but no one will know that I am a charity patient. Take me to Brywood Asylum.
Lights fade to soulful music.
Act III
Blythewood
Scene I
Four ladies sitting at one four tables in Dining Room of the Middle House at Blythewood Sanitarium – a large 19 Century historical estate (Dialog between four women telling why they are at Blythewood.
Anna
I am Anna. I am a nurse. I work here at Blythewood and I make it my job to sit with new comers to help them become comfortable. Tonight I am welcoming Mrs. Marty Mann, to my right. She is from New York City and she will be working with Doctor Tiebout.
Silence and the ladies all smile at each other.
Anna
Directly in front of me is Martha. She is also from New York City. She also works with Dr. T. And to my left is Nona Wyman who lives nearby in Greenwich. She also works with Dr. T. Martha why don’t you tell us about yourself?
Martha
Well. I live in New York City with my husband and children. I drink a lot and would like to stop but it has been impossible up to now. I was in Doctor’s Hospital last month and they say I escaped but I just walked out the door and got drunk right away. They could not find me and the hospital was scandalized by the New York Times coverage. It was no big deal but my family is embarrassed and wants to disown me. I am here as a last resort. Dr. Tiebout is my doctor. Nothing has been useful for my not wanting to drink.
M.M.
I remember you. I was at Doctor’s Hospital also. Your story in the New York Times was great. Good enough for them. They are puzzled by people like you. I think it’s great.
Martha
When I came here a few weeks ago they put me in the lockup house which is on the back of the campus furtherest from the road. Here it is called the violent house and it has a padded cell. You can hear people there screaming some times. I stayed there about ten days and moved to this house, the middle house. I want to move to the graduate house so I can go home soon. I think I am cured and will be able to drink like normal people.
Anna
Nona. Would you like to tell us about yourself?
Nona
Well, my name is Nona Wyman. I live in Greenwich with my husband who also drinks a lot. We have tried to stop but for me it of no use. I am hopeless and so is my husband. We cannot work because we cannot stay sober. My husband, Walter, and I go to this place in Kent, Connecticut. It is a farm called High Watch Farm . It is run by Sister Francis and while we are there neither of us wants to drink. Maybe when we all get out of here we can go to High Watch.
Anna
Thank you Nona. Now Mrs.. Mann do you feel like telling us about yourself?
M.M.
I was born in Chicago. A distant relative of the renowned educator, Horace Mann. When I was 14 I came down with TB and lived in and out of hospitals for about six years. Even before that I knew I was different from other girls although I am a female. I always wanted to play the male part when we played house or doctor or whatever. I wanted to be the father, the brother, the quarterback, the home run hitter.
You see, I was born a lesbian but I tried to conform to what was expected of girls but I wanted to be a boy. Once I told a pretty girl friend that if I were a boy I would ask her to go stead. She ran away and I never saw her again. Another time I told a girl how I felt and she shrieked and laughed and ran away and I never saw her again either. These experiences really affected me and my homophobia began to fester inside of me.
When I was nine or ten and reached puberty my girl friends began to notice boys and wanted to be with them but I did not. I was heartbroken and felt abandoned. I wanted to play football and baseball and ride bicycles with boys but I did not want boys like my girl friends did. My friends giggled with boys and wanted to be touched by them but I want to compete with them. I rough housed with boys. Since I was with boys I let them look at my body parts and feel them because I wanted to play with them, not for sex. So I became the boy’s guinea pig.
Then in my second decade I reached puberty and I really tried to change. I became sensitive and fearful of my feelings. I tried harder to conform to the female role as I perceived it. I wanted to be like the other girls in my class so I got a boy friend.
We went steady for seven years. We were really buddies. I got a motorcycle and a truck and we worked on cars together. Sex was an obligation that I endured mostly but that is not to say that I did not get aroused and get something out of it but mostly I did not.
That relationship ultimately became physically abusive. I would hit him and he would hit me. That continued through high school and into my third decade.
In my third decade, when I was about 24 I had become more and more excited about women and stressed that I might be gay. So I did the reasonable thing, I got married on short notice to a New Orleans drunk and we boozed our way to a divorce. I was in a rage one night and I told my husband that I wanted to be with women he laughed and said OK. But he changed his mind and became jealous and tried to control me. We got a divorce.
After the divorce I began calling myself Mrs. Marty Mann and go to gay bars. At first I just parked near a bar and watched to see what kind of people went in. Then I got up my nerve and went in and had a drink. That made the magic happens. I could dance and talk to new people. I felt like I belonged.
That was when my drinking really began in earnest both in the United States and Europe. I can truthfully say that I have been soused in the best saloons and worst saloons in North America and Europe. I really began to pursue women in earnest. After a few years I moved to Europe where I could pursue my interest in women and also write on my book. I did pursue women but I did not get the book done. But mostly I drank, as much as I could, all of the time.
I was in a drunken rage when I jumped off a balcony in England. I did not want to die; I just wanted some relief from my misery. After that I came home to America and was so drunk when I arrived that I had to be carried off the boat on a stretcher. After six months in a hospital I got six jobs in six months but could not stay sober so I got fired. I was in the hospital when I finally met Willie Seabrook and he told me about Blythewood Sanitarium. Here I am, I have not had a drink in 9 months and I am real thirsty. Willie knows about being a drunk.
Nobody understands the drunk except another drunk. I watch the crazy people come in here and start in the crazy house and move to the middle house and then to the graduate house and then go home. That is easy for them. The doctors know what is wrong with them and they can fix it.
But nobody knows what is wrong with a drunk that makes them drink. The Doctors here at Blythewood tell us that we can learn to drink like normal people. That is all good but I just cannot stop. That is the unkindest cut of all, to be really sick and not know what to call it. I am very tired of that life and want to be different.
I go to the city to see a play or a movie or my sister and suddenly it makes sense that I have a drink to take the edge off my nerves. Then before I know it I am on a bender and cannot stop till I am so sick I cannot move.
Other people come here, stop in the violent house, move to the middle house, then to the graduate house and then they go home. But not me, I am stuck here in this nut house.
Martha
Thank you Mrs. Mann. I am glad to learn about you but you know when you talk about yourself, you talk like you would about someone who is dead. Why is that? I did not know that you call a woman who wants a woman a lesbian. I have known lots of lesbians in my life. I just did not have a label for them.
M.M.
I don’t know. It is like I have been gone a long long time.
Nona
I feel the same way. Like I am someone else and not me. I have also known many lesbians in my life.
Anna
I am sure Dr. T. will be very interested in hearing all about this when he returns to work.
Lights Fade
Scene II
Blythewood
Two years pass. M.M. and Dr. T. in his psychiatric hospital office. M.M. lying on a psyche couch, Dr. T. sitting at the side behind her so she cannot see him write.
Dr. T.
I am afraid I have some bad news for you. Mrs. M. I know how hard you have worked at getting sober and staying that way. However, in two years here you have gotten drunk 20 times that I know about, not counting all of the times that the staff has snuck you in the back door and covered up for you while you got over your hangover. I have tried everything I know to help you but just as I told you before you came here, we doctors do not know what to do with people like you and I am not talking about you being a Lesbian. I have been told by Blythewood Owners that you will have to leave if you get drunk one more time.
Also, you know you talk entirely too much about being a lesbian. You don’t hear heterosexuals talking about being straight as much as you talk about being a lesbian, do you?
But you know that drunks are the heart breakers for us medical folks. We know that you have an illness that is killing you but we cannot put our finger on what it is or where it is situated in your physical self. I am a skeptic but it may be a spiritual malady that normal people do not have. I am afraid that if you continue drinking as you drink now, you will die drunk, go alcoholically insane or die in a drunken episode.
Lights fade
Scene III Blythewood
Same set up as before but reverse positions. Dr. T. is on the couch and M.M. is in the chair.
Dr. T.
I have been really under the weather. Could not get out of bed. Thank you so much for coming to visit me Mrs. M. I have something very important for you and it cannot wait.
M.M.
Thank you for asking me. I was afraid that you asked me here to tell me to pack up and get out. I hope I am wrong but you know how crazy I am. Any little thing is very big and big things are very little in my world.
Dr. T.
I have a book that was written by a bunch of people like you from New York and Ohio. It tells a lot of stories of people who could not stop drinking but they have found a way to stay sober for a few years now. I have read it and I want you to read it.
He hands her a large book with red covers and no title.
Dr. T.
The pages are mimeographed. They were going to print it like it is but decided to get some informed opinions about it from Medicine and Clergy. It might help you if you read it and by all means, tell me what you think.
M.M.
I will do anything you say. Of course I will read it. And you know I will tell you what I think.
Lights Fade
Same Setting
DR. T
I see that you have been reading. Tell me what you have found, please.
M.M.
Well #&?%*, it was written by a bunch of drunks like me. They sure know what they are talking about when it comes to drunks and hangovers. I could hardly believe the story of one of them lying on a concrete floor where it is cool to help get over a hangover. They remind me of my friend Willie Seabrook, but he is not one of them. They are all men and do not know anything about women. There is one lame story of a woman in the book.
It is so poorly written I can hardly get past the clichés. And that part about God is really more than I can handle. Let Go and Let God!!, There but for the grace of God go I, Live and let live, Think, Think, Think!!, First things First. All drivel.
Dr. T.
Really !! I would like to hear more about that.
M.M.
Well Dr T, you know that I am an intellectual. I am a thinker. They want me to turn my life and my will over to something they call a higher power but I am not fooled. It is just the same old religious pollution in a different package. If I have to do that, I am afraid that I will be like the hole in the doughnut, a nobody, dull boring and glum. I just can’t make myself do it.
Besides, I have trouble believing in God. I may not be atheists because I am not sure there is no God. Certainly I am not agnostic I was devout when I was a girl but for several years the conviction has been coming over me that I don’t really believe the things I was taught as a child. At first I was frightened by this realization; it seemed wicked and I thought God would punish me. Now I seem to have grown hardened to the idea. I cannot believe what seems to me unreasonable, even if I am damned for it. The spiritual stuff really baffles me. I am bewildered by the whole idea. If there is a higher power and he/she/it gave us reasoning power, no doubt we are intended to use it.
Dr. T.
We are not made so we can see God. For us, this is an act of faith, a venture of belief, to realize the Unseen Power. Yet we have much evidence of God’s existence in the strength that other people have received from this act of faith, the venture of belief. We are in a box of space and time and we can see neither our souls nor God. God and the human spirit are both outside the limitations of space and time. Yet our unseen help is effective here and now. That has been proved in thousands of changed lives. I do not believe that you have read enough yet. Please read some more and come back tomorrow.
Know this Mrs.. Mann. For an intellectual like you, the ultimate proof of the omnipotence of God is the fact that He does not even have to exist in order to save us.
Lights Fade Out
Same setting next day.
Dr. T.
Well, you look dapper today. What have you been reading?
M.M.
There was a bunch of people in England, I think called the Oxford Groups that talked a lot about living a spiritual life of love and service. I never bought into it because they did not like me being a lesbian. They spent a lot of time talking about sex and seem to think that their basic problem was too much sex. These guys call themselves Alcoholics and believe that the problem is mental and physical. They say that I am addicted to alcohol physically and obsessed with it mentally. Also that I am allergic to alcohol and anytime I take one drink I can’t stop taking the second drink and the third and on and on.
Lights Fade
Scene IV
Blythewood
Northern England Tudor like Townhouse, two stories with balconies overlooking courtyard. Courtyard lined with bright colored flowers. Everything is wet, it has been raining. There are benches around the perimeter of the courtyard and four or five street lamps lighting the surrounding area. Characters from Blythewood are walking around the courtyard. Their identity is self-evident.
Suddenly, from the balcony, center stage, a tall wild woman is shouting. She is angry and screaming at the top of her lungs. She is waving a big Red Book. A red glow lights up the back ground. She is literally seeing red.
M.M.
What do you mean people like you ? You mean me . Do you mean drunks? Or is it lesbians? Or is it just women you don’t like! Some doctor you are. People like you !!!! What does that mean? You’ll see how to deal with people like me. I hate these people. I’ll go to the store and get a bottle of booze and come back and get drunk. I’ll show them.
She goes back into the door off the balcony and the lights fade.
Scene V
Blythewood
And just as suddenly, the lights come on very brightly and instead of the previous courtyard, it is a scene in a bedroom where a woman can be seen on her knees bending over her bed weeping and moaning loudly, clutching the Big Red Book she is reading the book, now aloud.
M.M. is reading page forty two of the mimeographed edition of what would become known as The Big Book with the official title Alcoholics Anonymous. She reads aloud:
M.M.
“It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. To the precise extent that we permit these, do we squander the hours that might have been worthwhile. But with the alcoholic, whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual experience, this business of resentment is infinitely grave. We found that it is fatal. For when harboring such feeling we shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the Spirit. The insanity of alcohol returns and we drink again. And with us, to drink is to die. If we were to live, we had to be free of anger. The grouch and the brainstorm were not for us. They may be the dubious luxury of normal men, but for alcoholics these things are poison. If we were to live, we had to be free of anger..” These words stopped her in the midst of her rage and outburst.
Lights fade.
Scene VI
Blythewood, Dr. T’s Office
M.M.
I must be crazy. I have been changed by that damned book you gave me.
Dr. T.
Why would you say that? Tell me what happened.
M.M.
I felt enveloped by a warm blanket of air. A bright white light had replaced the red glow that I was seeing just seconds before. I felt like I was present and observing creation. It is so hard to describe. This is the way I always thought crazy people talked and felt.
Dr. T.
I see.
M.M.
I was not in a trap. My arms and body were free. It was like the walls had broken down and I was free. I mean really free. I did not have to do anything to show them . Everything was going to be OK. I felt free from fear. My anger was gone. I still hated the SOB business manager but other than that, I felt settled with the world, I had hope that something good would finally happen to me.
Dr. T.
Emmmmm! Go on.
M.M.
I felt completely different. The sky was blue. The grass was green. The trees were leafier. I felt like I was in a completely different world, like I could walk right out the window on the air and keep on walking. That frightened me because I felt that way in England after I jumped off the balcony and really hurt myself. That was when I rushed down to see you just now. I think I am really nuts now, don’t you.
Dr. T.
Truthfully now Mrs.. M I do not think you are crazy or anything like that. I think you have just had a spiritual experience like those we read about in The Variety of Religious Experiences by William James. That big red book that you are holding talks about it.
M.M.
But it doesn’t make any sense. I told you I am not a religious person. I used to believe in God but that was a long time ago. I don’t think God believes in me either.
Dr. T.
That’s all just fine for now. I could tell the moment I saw you at the door that something had happened. You just looked different. I can’t say I have ever experienced it myself nor have I ever seen anyone else do it but I have read about it and believe it happens. Whatever you have, I recommend that you hold on to it with all of your might and now you can spend some more time reading the book, again. Come back tomorrow, OK.
Lights Fade
Setting is same
M.M. in different clothes
Dr. T. in white medical coat
M.M.
I have read the book twice. I have got it. I no longer want to drink. I told Grennie about it and he has stopped wanting to drink. I want to get out of here and get a job and get a life. Without alcohol and the compulsion to drink, I am OK. I can’t believe that I have been cured by something that I hardly believe it, just by reading this precious book, but I have. I really have. I want everybody to know about it.
Dr. T
Mrs.. Mann you have made a mighty beginning. You are sober a month now. You have had a spiritual awakening and you have helped the alcoholics here at Blythewood who wanted help. Don’t you think it is time for you to meet these people you have been reading about.
M.M.
I was afraid you would come to that place, I would rather later than sooner. I do not want to meet them. I am afraid to meet them. I can just see them, old wrinkled, decrepit men, unshaved, dirty and smelly, wearing trench coats and sleeping on the streets.
Dr. T.
Well I knew that we would also come to that place sooner or later and I have made contact with Mr. Bill W. who wrote the book Alcoholics Anonymous. In fact, here is a card with the address where you are to meet the folks who will take you to the meeting. I want you to take the train to the city and catch a cab to this address. These people will be looking for you and they will take you to the meeting tonight!.
M.M.
TONIGHT !!
Dr. T
Yes, tonight. They only have a few meetings a week and this one is in a nice neighborhood on Sutton Place, a very distinguished address in New York and you will be safe there.
M.M.
Well at least derelicts don’t live on Sutton Place. Maybe Grennie will go with me. That way I won’t feel so strange.
Lights fade. Sounds of a train starting and stopping, a cab sounds in the city with horns and finally --
Act IV
Scene I
182 Clinton Street, Brooklyn
Dim lights outside the brownstone home of Bill and Lois Wilson. The group stopped outside the house and could hear laughter and happy sounds coming from inside. Lights go out again.
Scene II
Bright lights inside the house, two large rooms filled with the happy people sitting in chairs, standing, leaning against the wall and fireplace, sitting on the floor – 30/40 people crowded into the two rooms. M.M. walked into the room, saw the crowd, burst into tears and ran up the stairs only to return later with Lois Wilson who sat down beside M.M. on the couch.
L.W. (Lois Wilson)
I know this is all strange to you but we all have been waiting for you for a long time. We will love you till you can love yourself. We just met you but believe it or not, we know you.
M.M.
Thank you all. Yes this is very strange. I am more accustomed to being shunned and asked to leave instead of being greeted with love and acceptance. But I read the book and I had a spiritual experience and I want to be in this organization and stay sober.
OLDER MAN
Very knowledgeable, maybe arrogant, member of AA
Tell us Mrs.. Mann, when did you have your last drink?
M.M.
That would have been 61 days ago, the day before I was overwhelmed by page 63 of Alcoholics Anonymous, that reads; “We cannot live with anger.”
Second Older Man:
I don’t see how someone like you can be an alcoholic like us. Look at your expensive, stylish clothes and you look like a million dollars. Are you sure you know what a bottom is for alcoholics?
M.M.
I hope I do not have to deal with this again. My clothes are second hand. I am 34 years old. I have been drunk for the past fifteen years and I could not stop drinking once I took the first drink. I am a lesbian and have been for my whole life. I don’t expect to be a problem for either the men or the women of this organization. I have been drunk in some of the highest and lowest dives in Europe and the United States. I know being compelled to drink and if you mean what you say about Alcoholism and recovery I believe we will have a lasting and rewarding relationship.
Third Man
Well that sounds good but I don’t know about a woman. We have not had much success with women in the program, so far. Besides, you are really very young to be a real alcoholic.
M.M.
Well! I understand so let me give you a brief what it was like, what happened and where I am now.
I was a drunk when I left America in 1930 for Europe where I planned to write the Great American Novel. But in spite of all of my good intentions and efforts and the best efforts of my friends in Europe, I stayed drunk for five years. At one time I tried to kill myself by jumping off a balcony but only ended up breaking my leg, knocking out my teeth and getting a permanent limp when I walk. I returned to America in 1936 and was so drunk that I had to be carried off the ship on a stretcher. The last three years have been a nightmare of getting drunk, going to hospitals and institutions, living in a sanitarium and looking for a way to get sober. In other words, my life was unmanageable and I was powerless to do anything about it.
I met Dr. T. and became convinced that I could not do anything about my condition but I did not believe in the supernatural so I was frustrated and angry and hated myself and virtually everybody else. Dr. T. gave me this big red book and told me to read it. I did read it and objected to all the stuff about God. Slowly and grudgingly I concluded that I there may be a God and I am not It.
Shortly after that I was in a rage and page 63 of Alcoholics Anonymous revealed to me that I could not live with anger any longer. Through no action of my own I had a spiritual experience that shook me to the foundation of myself and the desire to drink was removed from me. With the help of this book and Dr. T. I have concluded that no human power could have relieved my alcoholism.
This was met with stunned silence by the group. Everyone recognized that she had had a spiritual experience of a very profound nature.
M.M.
I want to add this one thing so that the wives here will know that I am here for sobriety. I am a Lesbian with a capital L. I would not have been a threat to your husband when I was drinking and a drunk. I am not now a threat to them and while I want to be treated with respect like a lady, you do not need to worry about me messing with your man.
Clapping all around.
B.W. standing up and leaning on the fireplace. Tall and skinny, wearing hand me downs suit with a tie. The coat sleeves and pant legs are at least an inch too short and his white socks show between his pants and shoes.
B.W.
My name is Bill and I am an alcoholic.
Group:”Hi Bill”.
B.W.
Most of you know that we adopted that introduction from our friends at the Oxford Group. I might add that we are no longer affiliated with them because our focus is on the individual alcoholic and their focus is on God. We alcoholics need God but simple folks that we are we need a lot more direct instructions on how to live sober.
Now I want to welcome Mrs.. Mann to our fellowship. I met Marty through Dr. T. at Blythewood. Dr. T. you know is one of our greatest supporters in the Medical Field and he was complimented with a copy of the Big Book mimeographed edition to see if we are on track medically. He read it and gave the copy to Marty to read. That is the copy she has in her hands now. Trust me folks, she is a rummy just like us. Don’t be fooled by those fine Madison Avenue clothes she is wearing.
Laughter and applause.
Holding up a copy of the published Big Book.
B.W.
This is a great and glorious day for us in AA. This is the first copy of the first edition of the book Alcoholics Anonymous published by Works Publishing Company. I met our great and wonderful friend Dr Bob in Akron in 1935. On June 10, 1935 Dr Bob took his last drink and that is the date Alcoholics Anonymous was founded.
Dr Bob and I knew we had a way to stay sober by finding other alkies and helping them get sober. While in Akron we got two or three and I came home to New York and got a few more. Two years later I visited Akron again and when we added them up there was more than 100 of us. Dr Bob and I agreed that we needed a book to keep us on track. Now, two more years have passed and we have The Book.
That is all the time we have for the meeting tonight. I know that some of you have to go to work early in the morning so please stand and join me in closing in the usual manner. Our Father .
At the end of the Lord’s Prayer most of the group stand around and talk and drink coffee for a few minutes and then one or two at a time drift out the door until there are only four or five left including Marty, Lois, B.W., and two others. The lights fade and when they come back on there are five people sitting in a small room with living room furniture, sofa, a love seat and two easy chairs.
B.W.
Well Mrs.. Mann or can we call you Marty?
M.M.
Whatever you are comfortable with, my friends call me Marty and others call me Mrs. Mann. I just want to be a part of AA and stay sober and help others. I hope that is possible!
B.W.
Well Marty. Calling you Marty feels more comfortable to me. One of the first things most of us have to deal with is resentment. This is the number one offender for alcoholics. In step four we identify our resentments and get rid of them once and for all.
M.M.
I have read that in the book and I worked out a chart of people I have been angry with and to be honest, I don’t have any resentments. I hate a lot of people but resentments, I don’t have any. Round of laughter of identification. I don’t think I am being funny when I say that.
B.W.
We all laugh because we have been where you are with that one. Let me ask you this. Have you ever been angry or mad at someone in your entire life?
M.M.
Of course I have. Lots of times.
B.W.
What did you do and think when that happened?
M.M.
Well I just thought about it a lot. Relived the incident over and over. Planned the dismemberment or death of the offender. Wished they would die.
B.W.
That is resentment. Reliving the incident over and over and wishing for the punishment of the person we are angry with.
M.M.
Well in that case, I guess I do have a few resentments that I need to get rid of, especially if that is going to cause me to drink.
B.W.
OK folks, that is about all the time we have tonight. It is late and we ought to catch a little sleep before tomorrow starts over. We have plenty of extra places to sleep. Marty you can have the bed in one of the extra bedrooms upstairs. Anyone else who wants to stay can sleep on a couch or floor or where ever you can find a soft place to lie down. We will have breakfast in the morning about seven, morning devotional and then be on our way to do our own things. One more thing, especially Marty, you don’t have to get all of this by Thursday.
Scene III
Drat’s Office Blythwood
Dr. T.
Tell me about the meeting.
M.M.
Well it was not what I expected. There were no old unshaved men in trench coats and the women there did not look and act like hookers. Lois, Bill’s wife was just as gracious as could be. When I cried she held me and comforted me until I could regain control. She sat by me and when I needed support, she gave it. But I really fit in. When I told them that I am a Lesbian, no one reacted. Maybe they do not know what a Lesbian is or does.
Dr. T.
Sounds good. Go on.
M.M.
You know, I could finish the sentences of the men who shared. They could have been where I have been. I may have even been on a drunk with some of them. Thank Goodness for black outs. I felt like I had come home. I definitely belong to this group.
Dr. T.
Go on. Tell me more.
M.M.
They questioned me about my drinking and said that for someone who looks as good as I do they found it difficult to believe that I had suffered enough. I told them about my black outs and drunks in Europe and when I finished, they said, OK, you are one of us. Welcome aboard.
Dr. T.
Go on, please continue.
M.M.
Then the meeting ended and I stayed and talked with Bill and a few others about resentments. I sure have a lot of work to do. B.W. is my sponsor. He is so charismatic. So is Lois.
Dr. T.
Tell me about your resentments.
M.M.
Well ! I have acted as though all I have to do to get back at someone for offending me is to hate them enough and plan their punishment in my head and they will suffer. Turns out, I am the only one who suffers for this. ‘B.W. says it is like me drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.’ I don’t know but I am willing to try to give up my resentments and see what happens.
Dr. T.
I don’t see how it can hurt anything or make it worse.
M.M.
I have one of the first copies of the new book Alcoholics Anonymous that just came off the press. It is the same as the Red Book you gave me.
Lois and Bill know all about the High Watch Farm that NON talks about and B.W. and Lois and all of us are going up for a few days of spiritual nurturing. Then I need to find a job. I want to find a place to live in the city so I can meet with my sponsor and work on carrying the message.
Dr. T.
All of that from one meeting. AA did in one meeting what I have been trying to do for People Like You, Alcoholics, for years. Who am I to question the results?
M.M.
One more thing. Bill and Lois have been living in the home that once belonged to her family but their mortgage got behind and they were foreclosed on and are being evicted. Bill’s group has been meeting there but they have to find a new place. I am hoping that we will be able to start a group of AA here at Blythwood Sanitarium for the alcoholics here and in this area.
DR. T
I will request the management for an AA Meeting. They have approved a six months extension of your residence to give you time to get some sobriety and find a job and save a few dollars to get started over with. This will provide you with a total of almost three years here at Blythewood.
Scene IV
Hi Watch Farm, B.W. and Marty
B.W.
This place feels like sacred ground.
M.M.
I know what you mean. I feel it too. My sister and Grennie, her husband shared their
feelings about it with me last night.
B.W.
I have been surprised by Mrs.. X who owns the farm. She wants to give it to Alcoholics Anonymous so we can use it as an AA retreat and recovery training center. What do you think?
M.M.
Spectacular! I had this vision in my dream the other night. We can bring drunks here, sober them up, teach them how to practice the program and train them to carry the message. You know we need a plan of action to spread the word faster than the one to one we have had up to now.
B.W.
Ummmm! How does that work? It concerns me that we have been working for five years and have only reached a little over one hundred drunks.
M.M.
We are on the same wave length you know. We get them sober at the institute and teach them the program and then send them out to every city and town in America. Like missionaries. We can be like the religionists and send new comers out on a mission for maybe two or four years. That way we can reach thousands of suffering alcoholics instead on just one at a time. We will have meetings in every city in America before you know it.
B.W.
I have to confess I have been thinking about an AA Training Institute set up with a hospital. In one section we will use the hospital to detox drunks and help them get sober. Then we will teach them the program in another division. Maybe even have a school for job training. Then some of them could come to Hi Watch and train as missionaries.
M.M.
How about a residential AA center. You know I have had a hard time finding a place to live and I know you and Lo lived around for a long time before you were able to get a place to reside.
B.W.
This is going to cost a lot of money. Other people’s money. Do you know any rich people who would like to invest in AA?
M.M.
I don’t know any rich people like that right now. But let me tell you one thing. There is a rich drunk out there someplace with lots of money who is just looking for something big to invest in. We will find him/her, sober them up, give them the program and they will volunteer to donate the money for the AA Training Institute.
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