From Achilles to Tyler Durden: Why Fiction Matters For Men
Or, 5 Man-Tools
by Frank Marcopolos
Published by Whirligig Media at Smashwords
This work is licensed by Frank Joseph Marcopolos and Whirligig Media under the Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs License. To view a copy of this license, visit creativecommons.org or send a letter to Creative Commons, 559 Nathan Abbott Way, Stanford, California 94305, USA.You may freely distribute this manifesto in any way you choose (for free), but you can not charge money for it or change it in any way, and you must give the author credit for creating it.
Discover other titles by Frank Marcopolos at:
http://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/whirligigmedia
Smashwords Edition, License Notes
Thank you for downloading this free ebook. You are welcome to share it with your friends, neighbors, relatives, and any other human beings you so desire. This ebook may be reproduced, copied, and distributed for non-commerical purposes, provided the book remains in its complete, original form. If you enjoyed this book, please return to Smashwords.com to discover other works by this author. Thank you for your support.
ISBN: 978-0-9834599-6-5
China New Star
We—my mom, brother, sister, and I—were enjoying a rare family meal at China New Star Restaurant on Flatbush Avenue in Brooklyn. I was trying to explain to them what was so great about Paolo Coehlo’s international bestselling novel, THE ALCHEMIST, which I’d recently read. As I was going through a litany of praises, my sister, the devoted New Kids on the Block fan, sighed as only little sisters can sigh, and said, “If it has this great message about life and stuff, why not just tell us what it is?”
After expressing the exasperation of a big brother exhausted from 30+ years of being exasperated with his younger siblings, I said, “It’s not the same. You can’t just tell someone what the meaning of a great book is. Doesn’t work like that.”
“Why not?” my sister said.
“Because, that’s why,” I said, big-bro brilliant.
The embarrassing fact is, I didn’t know why on that day. But my little sister’s line of questioning stuck with me, and sent me on a path of discovery which revealed a great many truths, some of which I hope to share via this e-book.
I’m not claiming to be a modern-day guru. Nor do I think anything I have to say in this e-book is rocket science, or even particularly original. My goal is to collate—filter—the information I’ve found from different corners of the intellectual universe, and put it all down in one place. That’s essentially what I’m trying to do here.
Which brings me to my next point.
As I started thinking more and more about my little sister’s question, I started thinking about the role of fiction in our society, and how it seems that there’s a perception “out there” that fiction is for entertainment purposes only—that it’s not useful for helping us solve the many problems we face.
And that is DEAD WRONG.
Robert Bly says:
“The knowledge of how to build a nest in a bare tree, how to fly to the wintering place, how to perform the mating dance—all of this information is stored in the reservoirs of the bird’s instinctual brain. But human beings, sensing how much flexibility they might need in meeting new situations, decided to store this sort of knowledge outside the instinctual system; they stored it in stories. Stories, then—fairy stories, legends, myths, hearth stories—amount to a reservoir where we keep new ways of responding that we can adopt when the conventional and current ways wear out.”
Once it became clear that great fiction could have a distinctly useful purpose, I sought to find out what some of those purposes could be.
“Everything is a fight.”
That’s the first line of my first novel, ALMOST HOME, for a reason. It is a fact, I’ve come to know, of primary importance. I didn’t always think so, but I’ve come to realize that fighting—competition—is a natural, masculine instinct. We are—and always have been—the protectors in society, after all. From Achilles—the greatest of all the warriors from ancient Greek lore and star of Homer’s The Iliad—to Tyler Durden from Fight Club, it’s clear that all of history, preserved through storytelling, proves that men must fight in some form or fashion, or die inconsequential, forgotten lives full of misery and shame.
But that does not mean we are savages, either, nor should we be. I’ve learned, from Dr. Paul Dobransky and others, that we need to learn to be gentlemen, who, when needed, can fight to fend off attacks from enemies, whether they be street thugs or corporate Machiavellians. We need to cultivate a mature level of masculinity.
Back, for a second, to China New Star Restaurant. You may have noticed an absence at that table I mentioned earlier. My father has been more or less absent from my life for about 23 years now, and completely absent—by my persistent insistence—for about 11 years. And I don’t think I’m alone in that regard. The problem is, for too many of us men, we’ve grown up without fathers, with absentee fathers, or with ineffective fathers. And good fathers, among many other essential things, teach their sons how (and when) to FIGHT. (And, again, everything in life is, one way or another, a FIGHT. Even if you choose not to participate—you don’t fight, you lose. Plain and simple.) Some statistical evidence to show I’m not an outlier:
- According to 2009 census data, 1 out of every 3 children live apart from their father. Children who live absent their biological fathers are, on average, at least two to three times more likely to be poor, to use drugs, to experience educational, health, emotional and behavioral problems, to be victims of child abuse, and to engage in criminal behavior than their peers who live with their married, biological (or adoptive) parents. (Source: fatherhood.org.)
- Researchers at
Columbia University found that children living in two-parent
household with a poor relationship with their father are 68% more
likely to smoke, drink, or use drugs compared to all teens in
two-parent households. Teens in single mother households are at a 30%
higher risk than those in two-parent households.
Source:
“Survey Links Teen Drug Use, Relationship With Father.”
Alcoholism & Drug Abuse Weekly 6 September 1999: 5.
- Fatherless children
are twice as likely to drop out of school.
Source: U.S.
Department of Health and Human Services. National Center for Health
Statistics. Survey on Child Health. Washington, D.C.: GPO, 1993
So, there’s an epidemic of epic proportions in this country, the effects of which ripple out into every aspect of our society. So, what can we do about it? I’ll get to that shortly, but first, I need to make a disclaimer.
This e-book is for men. It is NOT for women. If you’re a woman reading this, feel free to continue, but understand that it is not written for you. I’m going to try to make the case that fiction matters for men, and women already know why fiction matters for them. For one thing, women consume a metric shit-ton of it (and everything else.) Here’s the evidence, per Romance Writers of America:
- Romance fiction generated $1.36 billion in sales in 2009
- Romance fiction is the #1 genre of fiction, by far (doubling the next highest, “Religious/Inspirational”).
- About 75 million people read at least 1 romance novel in 2008
- 91% of romance readers are women
- Women account for 85% of ALL consumer purchases (source: Stephanie Holland, Holland+Holland Advertising)
- 55% of women spent time reading literature in 2010 (source: Stephanie Holland)
- “Women dominate purchasing (novels) across all genres” (source: Bowker, 2011 report on 2010 data)
Guys, we’re getting our asses kicked, bad.
“According to Tom Peters, one of the world’s top marketing gurus, women are the top marketing opportunity for the foreseeable future.” – Linda Landers, girlpowermarketing.com
Remember, advertisers position their products to appeal to whomever makes the buying decisions. And almost ALL media—TV shows, music, radio programming, magazines, books, the news, websites—aim their content toward acquiring those advertising dollars in any way they can. In other words, all of that content is currently made to appeal to WOMEN.
Guys, we’re losing and losing bad, like 85-9 bad.
Think for a second about how much advertising is shoved into our attention and know that if 85% of it is geared toward women, you can be sure a massive portion of that will be messaged as “anti-man,” subtly or otherwise. For proof, just check out any random TV or radio commercial and more than likely it’ll feature some dopey guy getting kicked in the nuts, more or less, with a Goddess-Woman flaunting her empowerment in the poor fella’s face.
And with fiction, that’s especially true. But it’s pretty clear that women already understand that fiction is an integral part of their lives. No need for it to be addressed, and certainly not by me. So, to any women still reading this now: I love you, but I bid you a fond adieu.
Now. Why are women consuming so much fiction, and why aren’t men? Could it be possible that fiction might be able to provide a kind of substitute fathering (and/or mothering for women)? Would that account for fiction’s powerful allure? Why is fiction so dang powerful (considering that if it weren’t powerful, women wouldn’t touch it)? I’ve come to believe, after a lot of research on the subject, that the power of storytelling stems from its unique ability to shift people into new beliefs.
What is the difference between a belief and an idea?
The way I see it is: a belief is an idea with an extremely strong emotion (fear, love, greed, etc.) super-gluing it to our minds. We usually form our beliefs when we’re young kids because at that stage of physical and psychological development we’re more vulnerable to the manipulation of our psychological boundaries by well-meaning (or otherwise) authority figures—they can easily KrazyGlue-stick their beliefs onto our brains, in other words.
I was first introduced to this concept through Dr. Paul Dobransky’s work as I was researching, in an attempt to improve my writing, how different personalities (“temperaments”) interact with each other. After all, how can you write about conflict or love or teamwork or anything, really, if you don’t have a solid foundation of psych-knowledge from which to build your drama? I highly recommend all of Dr. Paul’s programs, especially “KWML Mastery” and “MindOS,” which can be accessed here:
So, if you want to make someone BELIEVE in something, instead of just telling them an IDEA, one of the best ways to do that is to embed that idea within a compelling story. This is why fiction can be 100 times more valuable than non-fiction.
And that is the answer to my kid sister’s question.
You can’t make someone truly believe something simply by telling them one of another of the 8 billion ideas they will hear in a day. You’ve got to sell it through storytelling.
Now, what other reasons could there be for women to be consuming fiction like candy, whereas men are not? Are some of the stereotypes true? Stereotypes like:
- Men don’t read. And certainly NOT artsy-fartsy fiction stuff. That’s “girlie.” A Guns & Ammo magazine is okay, and maybe a Sports Illustrated or Maxxim, but that’s it.
- Men don’t have emotions. And if they have them, they certainly are not allowed to pay attention to them, or God forbid express them. If fiction has to do with emotions, then, certainly, fiction’s for girls.
- Men don’t think of fiction as anything BUT entertainment, fun for a while, but of no practical value other than being entertained while reading the story. Therefore, since fiction can’t help men solve problems (fixing problems being a core trait of masculinity), fiction is of little value to us.
Well, I’d like to make a bold statement: all of those stereotypes are total fucking bullshit.
With so many men having arrived at the chronological state of manhood without having had the guidance, admiration, and role-modeling of a good father, we haven’t been taught how to access our emotions to solve problems, how to use stories to help us in life, and how to READ for any and all reasons. Lack of reading-awareness is not something within us, inherent to manhood, that can’t be changed—it’s just what we’ve learned from inept teaching, due to the absence of good fathers.
And I believe it has left this country in a state of pussification, men in a state of wussification, and women sitting around going, “Where have all the REAL men gone?” (Source: David DeAngelo and the billion-dollar “P.U.A.” market.)
So, what the hell can we do about all of this? Here are 5 tools I think may be of some assistance.
Tool #1: Kill All Self-Destructive Habits
(Brain Strength
Training)
One of the best decisions I’ve made recently is to respect my brain. I came to the conclusion (through divine intervention, it seems) that if I wanted to have any chance to excel at fiction-writing, I could spare absolutely no more brain cells. So, I had to learn about how alcohol, bad nutrition, and other hazards affect the brain.
You can see, clearly, in the picture above, the devastating effects of alcohol consumption. The alcoholic brain is smaller, and has holes in it where normal, functioning brain matter is supposed to be. Drinking alcohol creates holes in your brain. The researchers who conducted these studies concluded that this holds true not only for alcoholics, but also for moderate-to-light drinkers as well. Think about THAT before you “Grab Some Buds.”
Similarly, smoking cigarettes, eating garbage (highly processed) foods, taking drugs… all these things CREATE HOLES in your brain. For me, I knew I just couldn’t afford to have a brain with holes all over the place if I wanted to have any shot at being able to write compelling novels. Life (and writing) is just too difficult as it is without voluntarily handicapping myself. Don’t you think?
The good news is that if we STOP drilling holes into our brains, the research shows that the damage is reversable.
(Further reading: The Brain Diet by Alan Logan; Change Your Brain, Change Your Body by Daniel Amen, M.D.)
If you agree, then the first tool in the toolbox is to kill all of the following dead from your life: drinking beer, smoking cigarettes, junk food, pizza, dairy, white carbs, bread, and fruit as a means to build a strong mind, instead of destroying it. Think of all of these things as poisons, which is what they really are. We have evolved for millennia on this planet along with plants and animals, not processed foods and beer.
We can no longer be the bumbling, idiotic stereotype of so many American sit-coms –the Al Bundy, Homer Simpson, Ray Barone, Doug Heffernans that get led around their lives on a leash controlled by their wives. No, it’s time to break free from those leashes! And the first step is to strengthen our brains through proper nutrition.
The ultimate guide for this is The 4-Hour Body by Timothy Ferriss:
The basic idea in that book is to eat 3 or 4 meals per day of the following foods: protein (all meats/fish/chicken, etc.), vegetables, and beans or nuts. That’s six days per week. 1 day per week, you can eat anything you want, in any quantity you want. I know I’m simplifying this, and it can be hard to make dietary changes, but this is an essential first step for brain strength training. Following the 4-Hour Body guidelines, I went from 232 pounds to 180 in 6 months’ time. I also supplement with Athletic Greens, a powdered superfood from all-natural sources optimized for maximum absorption via water mixture, to ensure optimal nutrition:
Beyond just losing weight (which is pretty awesome in and of itself), I’m also happier, healthier, more energetic, and more productive. In fact, I’ve never been this productive in my 37 years on this planet. It’s pretty amazing, actually.
Next, reduce television-watching to the absolute minimum. Television is an anesthetic controlled by gigantacorps to influence your behaviors to their financial benefit. (Also known as “advertising.”) Want to have more freedom in your life? Watch less TV. The way a television emits light patterns has a hynotic effect on our brains, putting them in what’s known as the alpha-wave state, which is a zombie-like condition that is antithetical to independent thinking and win-win decision-making. We, basically, are very easily influenced by whatever message is being zapped into our brains at this state of consciousness. (Kinda useful if you’re trying to sell a product, eh?)
Watch this 3-minute YouTube vid for more on this:
(See also: Remote Control: Television and the Manipulation of American Life by Frank Mankiewicz and Joel Swerdlow; Four Arguments for the Elimination of Television by Jerry Mander.)
Next comes exercise. I’ve always been an athlete, but my exercise routine took a hit when I broke my fibula bone during an airborne operation when I was a paratrooper. Since that time, I have tried many different routines with limited results. That changed when I read Tim Ferriss’s book. Not only is it a game-changer in terms of nutrition, but it also explains how to maximize your workouts based on the “Minimum Effective Dose” principle. Basically, you want to do the least amount of work possible to get the best results. Ferriss shows you how to do it, based on years of accumulated research, personal and otherwise. Ferriss also debunks many ancient methods of exercise by taking unusual approaches, or approaches used heretofore only by world-class athletes and distilling them down to their core principles.
I can’t recommend highly enough Tim’s book, The 4-Hour Body. Read it! As of this writing, it’s $12.99 as an e-book for Kindle—in other words, a freakin’ bargain. The body and mind are connected, so to improve our minds, we must improve our bodies.
If we make these changes, we can prepare our brains for the next steps. (Or for anything we want to accomplish in life, really.)
More info on how exercise affects the brain:
http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/07/27/how-exercise-can-keep-the-brain-fit/
Tool #2: The Wild Man in “Iron John”
(A Fiction First
Step)
Now that we’ve strengthened our brains, it’s time to whip out the second tool in the toolbox: READING FICTION. This is something I’ve been doing since I was a child and my love for reading has not waned over the years. If anything, it’s become more feverish lately (stoked by the invention of the Kindle.) And the first story to read is “Iron John” by the Brothers Grimm. (If you haven’t read it yet, I’ve included the story in its entirety below. And I know, I know…. but they’re NOT just for women! Trust me on this.)
The thing about fables is this: cultures from everywhere on Earth ever since we could speak have treasured fables such as “Iron John” as teaching tools. Where are today’s fables? Why aren’t the old ones being taught systematically to kids in school? Did you even know there’s such a thing as a fable or “fairy tale”for men? A “hairy tale” if you will?
How can we break free from the various leashes society likes to rope around our necks? Understanding the role of the “Wild Man” in “Iron John” is a great way to begin our understanding of the process. If you don’t have time to read it, you can grab an MP3 (audio) version of the story from my website here:
http://frankmarcopolos.com/archives/1135
This way, you can listen while you work out, commute, or whatever. (Podcasts in general, by the way, are a great substitute for television because they require active participation of the brain, similar to reading. And today there are podcasts available—for free—on EVERY subject you can imagine. You can check them out on iTunes, Podcast Pickle, Zune Marketplace, or any other “podcatcher.”)
If you prefer to read the story, here it is:
Iron John
by the Brothers Grimm
THERE was, once upon a time, a King, who had a great forest near his palace, full of all kinds of wild animals. One day he sent out a hunter to shoot him a deer, but he did not come back. “Perhaps some accident has befallen him,” said the King, and the next day he sent out two more hunters to search for him, but they too didn’t come back. Then on the third day, he sent for all of his hunters, and said, “Scour the whole forest, and do not give up until you have found all three.”
But of these also, none came home again, and their pack of hounds which they had taken with them, disappeared as well. From that time forth, no one would any longer venture into the forest, and it lay there in deep stillness and solitude, and nothing was seen of it, but sometimes an eagle or a hawk flying over it.
This lasted for many years, when a strange hunter announced himself to the King as seeking some work to do, and offered to go into the dangerous forest. The King, however, would not give his consent, and said, “It is not safe in there; I fear you would fare no better than the others, and you would never come out again.”
The hunter replied, “Lord, I will venture it at my own risk, because of fear I know nothing.”
The hunter therefore went with his dog to the forest. It was not long before the dog picked up the scent of game and went in pursuit; but hardly had the dog run two steps when it stood before a deep pool, could go no farther, and a naked arm stretched itself out of the water, seized it, and drew it under. When the hunter saw that, he went back and fetched three men to come with buckets and bale out the water. When they could see to the bottom there lay a Wild Man whose body was brown like rusty iron, and whose hair hung over his face down to his knees. They bound him with cords, and led him away to the castle.
There was great astonishment over the Wild Man; the King, however, had him put in an iron cage in his courtyard, and forbade the door to be opened on pain of death, and the Queen herself was to take the key into her keeping. And from this time forth everyone could again go into the forest with safety.
The King had an eight-year-old son, who was once playing in the courtyard, and while he was playing, his golden ball fell into the cage. The boy ran there and said, “Give me my ball.”
“Not till you have opened the door for me,” answered the man.
“No,” said the boy, “I will not do that; the King has forbidden it,” and ran away.
The next day he again went and asked for his ball. The Wild Man said, “Open my door,” but the boy would not. On the third day, the King had ridden out hunting, and the boy went once more and said, “I cannot open the door even if I wished, for I have not the key.”
Then the Wild Man said, “It lies under your mother’s pillow, you can get it there.” The boy, who wanted to have his ball back, cast all caution to the winds, and brought the key. The door opened with difficulty, and the boy pinched his finger. When it was open, the Wild Man stepped out, gave him the golden ball, and hurried away. The boy had become afraid; he called and cried after him, “Oh, Wild Man, do not go away, or I shall be beaten!”
The Wild Man turned back, took him up, set him on his shoulder, and went with hasty steps into the forest. When the King came home, he observed the empty cage, and asked the Queen how that had happened. She knew nothing about it, and sought the key, but it was gone. She called the boy, but no one answered. The King sent out people to seek for him in the fields, but they did not find him. Then he could easily guess what had happened, and much grief reigned in the royal court.
When the Wild Man had once more reached the dark forest, he took the boy down from his shoulder, and said to him, “You will never see your father and mother again, but I will keep you with me, for you have set me free, and I have compassion for you. If you do all I ask of you, you shall fare well. Of treasure and gold have I enough, and more than anyone in the world.” He made a bed of moss for the boy on which he slept, and the next morning the man took him to a river, and said, “Behold, the golden spring is as bright and clear as crystal, you shall sit beside it, and take care that nothing falls into it, or it will be polluted. I will come every evening to see if you have obeyed my order.”
The boy placed himself by the banks of the spring, and often saw a golden fish or a golden snake show itself therein, and took care that nothing fell in. As he was thus sitting, his finger hurt him so violently that he involuntarily plunged it into the water. He drew it quickly out again, but saw that it was quite gilded, and whatsoever pains he took to wash the gold off again, he could not. In the evening Iron John came back, looked at the boy, and said, “What has happened to the spring?”
“Nothing, nothing,” he answered, and held his finger behind his back, that the man might not see it.
But the Wild Man said, “You have dipped your finger into the water. This time it may pass, but take care you do not let anything else go in.” By daybreak the boy was already sitting by the spring and watching it. His finger hurt him again and he passed it over his head, and then unhappily a hair fell down into the well. He took it quickly out, but it was already quite gilded.
Iron John came, and already knew what had happened. “Thou hast let a hair fall into the spring,” said he. “I will allow you to watch by it once more, but if this happens for a third time then the spring is polluted, and you can no longer remain with me.”
On the third day, the boy sat by the spring, and did not stir his finger, however much it hurt him. But the time was long to him, and he looked at the reflection of his face on the surface of the water. And as he still bent down more and more while he was doing so, and trying to look straight into his eyes, his long hair fell down from his shoulders and into the water. He raised himself up quickly, but the whole of the hair of his head was already golden and shone like the sun.
You may imagine how terrified the poor boy was! He took his pocket-handkerchief and tied it around his head, in order that the man might not see it.
When he came he already knew everything, and said, “Take the handkerchief off.” Then the golden hair streamed forth, and though the boy made excuses, it was of no use. “You have not stood the trial, and can stay here no longer. Go forth into the world. There you will learn what poverty is. But as you have a good heart, and as I mean well by you, there is one thing I will grant you; if you fall into any difficulty, come to the forest and cry, “Iron John,” and then I will come and help you. My power is great, greater than you think, and I have gold and silver in abundance.”
Then the King’s son left the forest, and walked by beaten and unbeaten paths ever onwards until at length he reached a great city. There he looked for work, but could find none, and he had learnt nothing by which he could help himself. At length he went to the palace, and asked if they would take him in. The people about court did not at all know what use they could make of him, but they liked him, and told him to stay. At length the cook took him into his service, and said he might carry wood and water, and rake the cinders together.
Once when it so happened that no one else was at hand, the cook ordered him to carry the food to the royal table, but as he did not like to let his golden hair be seen, the boy kept his little cap on. Such a thing as that had never yet come under the King’s notice, and he said, “When you come to the royal table you must take your hat off.”
He answered, “Ah, Lord, I cannot; I have a bad sore place on my head.” Then the King had the cook called before him and scolded him, and asked how he could take such a boy as that into his service; and that he was to turn him off at once. The cook, however, had pity on him, and exchanged him for the gardener’s boy.
And now the boy had to plant and water the garden, hoe and dig, and bear the wind and bad weather. Once in summer when he was working alone in the garden, the day was so warm he took his little cap off so that the air might cool him. As the sun shone on his hair it glittered and flashed so that the rays fell into the bedroom of the King’s daughter, and up she sprang to see what that could be. Then she saw the boy, and cried to him, “Boy, bring me a wreath of flowers.” He put his cap on with all haste, and gathered wild field-flowers and bound them together. When he was ascending the stairs with them, the gardener met him, and said, “How can you take the King’s daughter a garland of such common flowers? Go quickly, and get another, and seek out the prettiest and rarest.”
“Oh, no,” replied the boy, “the wild ones have more scent, and will please her better.”
When he got into the room, the King’s daughter said, “Take your cap off, it is not seemly to keep it on in my presence.” He again said, “I may not, I have a sore head.” She, however, caught at his cap and pulled it off, and then his golden hair rolled down on his shoulders, and it was splendid to behold. He wanted to run out, but she held him by the arm, and gave him a handful of ducats. With these he departed, but he cared nothing for the gold pieces. He took them to the gardener, and said, “I present them to your children, they can play with them.”
The following day the King’s daughter again called to him that he was to bring her a wreath of field-flowers, and when he went in with it, she instantly snatched at his cap, and wanted to take it away from him, but he held it fast with both hands. She again gave him a handful of ducats, but he would not keep them, and gave them to the gardener for playthings for his children. On the third day things went just the same; she could not get his cap away from him, and he would not have her money.
Not long afterwards, the country was overrun by war. The King gathered together his people, and did not know whether he could offer any opposition to the enemy, who was superior in strength and had a mighty army. Then said the gardener’s boy, “I am grown up, and will go to the wars also, only give me a horse.” The others laughed, and said, “Seek one for yourself when we are gone, we will leave one behind us in the stable for you.” When they had gone forth, he went into the stable, and got the horse out; it was lame of one foot, and limped hobblety jig, hobblety jig; nevertheless he mounted it, and rode away to the dark forest. When he came to the outskirts, he called “Iron John,” three times so loudly that it echoed through the trees. Thereupon the Wild Man appeared immediately, and said, “What do you desire?”
“I want a strong steed, for I am going to the wars.”
“That you shall have, and still more than you ask for.” Then the Wild Man went back into the forest, and it was not long before a stable-boy came out of it, who led a horse that snorted with its nostrils, and could hardly be restrained, and behind them followed a great troop of soldiers entirely equipped in iron, and their swords flashed in the sun. The youth gave over his three-legged horse to the stable-boy, mounted the other, and rode at the head of the soldiers. When he got near the battlefield a great part of the King’s men had already fallen, and soon the rest would surely fall.
Then the youth galloped there with his iron soldiers, broke like a hurricane over the enemy, and beat down all who opposed him. They began to fly, but the youth pursued, and never stopped, until there was not a single man left. Instead, however, of returning to the King, he conducted his troop by bye-ways back to the forest, and called forth Iron John. “What do you desire?” asked the Wild Man.
“Take back your horse and your troops, and give me my three-legged horse again.” All that he asked was done, and soon he was riding on his three-legged horse. When the King returned to his palace, his daughter went to meet him, and wished him joy of his victory. “I am not the one who carried away the victory,” said he, “but a strange knight who came to my assistance with his soldiers.”
The daughter wanted to hear who the strange knight was, but the King did not know, and said, “He followed the enemy, and I did not see him again.” She inquired of the gardener where his boy was, but he smiled, and said, “He has just come home on his three-legged horse, and the others have been mocking him, and crying, “Here comes our hobblety jig back again!” They asked, too, “Under what hedge have you been sleeping all the time?” He, however, said, “I did the best of all, and it would have gone badly without me.” And then they laughed at him even louder.
The King said to his daughter, “I will proclaim a great feast that shall last for three days, and you shall throw a golden apple. Perhaps the unknown will come to it.” When the feast was announced, the youth went out to the forest, and called Iron John. “What do you desire?” asked he. “That I may catch the King’s daughter’s golden apple.”
“It is as safe as if you had it already,” said Iron John. “You shall likewise have a suit of red armour for the occasion, and ride on a spirited chestnut-horse.” When the day came, the youth galloped to the spot, took his place amongst the knights, and was recognized by no one. The King’s daughter came forward, and threw a golden apple to the knights, but none of them caught it but he, only as soon as he had it, he galloped away.
On the second day Iron John equipped him as a white knight, and gave him a white horse. Again he was the only one who caught the apple, and he did not linger an instant, but galloped off with it. The King grew angry, and said, “That is not allowed; he must appear before me and tell his name.” He gave the order that if the knight who caught the apple should go away again they should pursue him, and if he would not come back willingly, they were to cut him down and stab him.
On the third day, he received from Iron John a suit of black armor and a black horse, and again he caught the apple. But when he was riding off with it, the King’s attendants pursued him, and one of them got so near him that he wounded the youth’s leg with the point of his sword. The youth nevertheless escaped from them, but his horse leapt so violently that the helmet fell from the youth’s head, and they could see that he had golden hair. They rode back and announced this to the King.
The following day the King’s daughter asked the gardener about his boy. “He is at work in the garden; the queer creature has been at the festival too, and only came home yesterday evening; he has likewise shown my children three golden apples which he has won.”
The King had him summoned into his presence, and he came and again had his little cap on his head. But the King’s daughter went up to him and took it off, and then his golden hair fell down over his shoulders, and he was so handsome that all were amazed. “Are you the knight who came every day to the festival, always in different colours, and who caught the three golden apples?” asked the King.
“Yes,” answered he, “and here the apples are,” and he took them out of his pocket, and returned them to the King. “If you desire further proof, you may see the wound which your soldiers gave me when they followed me. But I am likewise the knight who helped you to your victory over your enemies.”
“If you can perform such deeds as that, you are no gardener’s boy; tell me, who is your father?”
“My father is a mighty King, and gold have I in plenty, as great as I require.”
“I well see,” said the King, “that I owe thanks to you; can I do anything to please you?”
“Yes,” answered he, “that indeed you can. Give me your daughter to marry.”
The maiden laughed, and said, “He does not stand much on ceremony, but I have already seen by his golden hair that he was no gardener’s boy,” and then she went and kissed him.
The boy’s father and mother came to the wedding, and were in great delight, for they had given up all hope of ever seeing their dear son again. And as they were sitting at the marriage-feast, the music suddenly stopped, the doors opened, and a stately King came in with a great entourage.
He went up to the youth, embraced him and said, “I am Iron John, and was by enchantment a Wild Man, but you have set me free; all the treasures which I possess shall now be your property.”
The End
As you can see, there is much symbolism in this story, and we’ll need to look deeply into it to gain all of the insights from it that will enable us to solve some of our most dire problems.
Tool #3: Iron John: A Book About Men by Robert Bly
(Deeper
Impact)
To deepen our understanding of the Brothers Grimm tale, we must read Iron John: A Book About Men by Robert Bly. For a free, alternative analysis of the story by Jim Moyers, go to:
http://www.jimmoyers.com/Wildman_to_King/Part_I.html
It’s long, and excellent, but it’s not really a suitable substitute for Mr. Bly’s book. Speaking of Mr. Bly, I think the best way to introduce you to his incredible work is to let you sample a portion of his wisdom.
Mr. Bly: “I speak of the Wild Man in this book, and the distinction between the savage man and the Wild Man is crucial throughout. The savage mode does great damage to soul, earth, and humankind; we can say that though the savage man is wounded he prefers not to examine it. The Wild Man, who has examined his wound, resembles a Zen priest, a shaman, a woodsman more than a savage.”
“When we tell a fairy story, we are not offering a new psychological theory; the story provides some sort of clear water that has descended over the centuries through yards and yards of earth….[F]airy stories are the major gift we have received from the preliterate ancient world. They’re wilder than Aristotle’s ideas, deeper than Luther’s complaints, more full of truth than Montaigne’s prose…”
“Men are suffering right now—young men especially. Now that so many men have gotten in touch with their grief, their longing for the father and mentor connections, we are more ready to start seeing the Wild Man and to look again at initiation.”
This is essential – FICTION IS FULL OF USEFUL INFO!!!! Mr. Bly’s book was a transformative experience for me. It contains so much insight, so much knowledge, it’s simply amazing. You must, must, must read this book.
That’s the 3rd tool in the toolbox—coupling “Iron John” with Mr. Bly’s Iron John. Not much else I can say. They’re that powerful.
Tool #4: Stuff a Kindle
(Life-Long Enlightenment)
Now we’re cooking. Since we’ve seen, clearly, how fiction can help us, now we need to reach deeper into the ancient archives to see what other tools we can find. You can, these miraculous days, buy a Kindle e-reader for about $100, and then load it up with over 18,000 free, public-domain titles chock full of awesome goodness. William Shakespeare, Mark Twain, Edgar Allan Poe, Ernest Hemingway, Nathaniel Hawthorne, Homer, Virgil, on and on. Titles like:
- The Count of Monte Cristo
- The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes
- The Scarlet Letter
- Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland
- A Tale of Two Cities
- Dracula
- War and Peace
- Treasure Island
- The Art of War (non-fiction)
- The Legend of Sleepy Hollow
- The Legends of King Arthur and His Knights
- Gulliver’s Travels
- Grimm’s Fairy Stories
- Frankenstein
- Anna Karenina
- The Time Machine
- The Picture of Dorian Gray
- The Adventures of Tam Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn
- Crime and Punishment
- The Iliad
- The Odyssey
- The Jungle Book
- The Prince
- Moby Dick, or The Whale
- White Fang
- The War of the Worlds
- Heart of Darkness
- The Man Who Knew Too Much
- Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea
- The Call of the Wild
- The Man Who Would Be King
- The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde
- A Journey to the Center of the Earth
- Civil Disobedience
- Utopia
- The Invisible Man
- The Jungle
- Anthem
- The Man in the Iron Mask
...And many, many others. Just load that shit up and then ambush your brain with the wisdom men (mostly, some of these titles were written by women) have felt the extreme need to send down through the air-hatch of time. As for short stories, I’ve picked over 30 of the best ever written, and narrated them. You can get the MP3’s for free when you sign up for my newsletter at:
My personal favorite public-domain titles are The Count of Montecristo, The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes, The Complete Short Stories of Edgar Allan Poe, The Complete Short Stories of Ambrose Bierce, and The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. Those would make for a good starting point. For a small investment of time and money, you can’t really get a return on your assets any better than that.
Tool #5: Actionize
All the wisdom in the world is useless if you don’t take action—if you don’t fix a problem and/or improve your life.
The final tool in the toolbox is to take ACTION based on all that wisdom you’ve just acquired. What that action is, you’ll have to decide for yourself because it’s different for every man. It might be to become more involved with your children’s lives. It may simply be to start saying “No” more often. It may be to pursue that secret passion you’ve been hiding for years, whatever that may be. It may be to start a business BASED on that secret passion. It may be to start a “Men’s Studies” program at your university, to balance out the “Women’s Studies” program. (Equal rights, after all.) It may be to start a club for men to discuss the concepts in Iron John at halftime of the Monday Night Football game.
For me, that action was to jam as much of what I’d learned over the years into my fiction writing. The first fully-developed result of that is in ALMOST HOME. (But I think you can see the themes sneaking into my earlier work as well. Funny thing, the subconscious.)
But whatever it is for you, it should be constructive and win-win, where the first win goes to YOU, and then the second win goes to whomever you’re dealing with. This is essential because if you don’t become proficient at getting your win first, you’re not in any position to provide wins for anyone else.
If you don’t know what action to take (some call it “finding your mission in life”) here are some resources:
http://innergamereframe.com/how-to-find-and-live-your-mission/
http://thinksimplenow.com/happiness/life-on-purpose-15-questions-to-discover-your-personal-mission/
http://www.superlifegroup.com/club/how-to-find-your-mission-in-life.html
http://www.youmeworks.com/idontknowwhattodowithmylife.html
http://www.midlife-men.com/lifemission.html
http://firstknowwhatyouwant.com/archives/190
And Dr. Paul has some great material on this subject as well. His site, again, is:
Personally, I promise to continue reading and continue writing—because that’s my mission. What’s yours? Let me know how it’s going with you: frank@frankmarcopolos.com.
- Frank
About the Author:
Frank Marcopolos’s substitute fathers, none of whom he has ever
met, have been: Bill Hicks, Dr. Paul Dobransky, J.D. Salinger,
Marshall Mathers, David Simon, and Robert Bly.
Frank was an English Lit major at New Paltz College, pitched and played first base as a 4-year starter for them, then went into the military to defend freedom by jumping out of airplanes. He showed up at Basic Training with a copy of MacBeth in one hand and Duino Elegies in the other, so he supposes he’s always been pre-destined to bring the concepts of brute force and literary might together somehow. He started a literary magazine called The Whirligig once he was discharged from the military after they would not grant his request for a $1 million signing bonus to re-enlist. The Whirligig is now defunct, but is available as an e-book online.
When not writing he spends his work-days consulting with businesses in all industries on how to improve their profitability by keeping their employees safe from harm.
Visit Frank online:
Twitter: http://twitter.com/FrankMarcopolos
Facebook: http://facebook.com/frankmarcopolos
Website: http://frankmarcopolos.com