A Solitary Flame
Katica Locke
Published by Katica Locke at Smashwords
Copyright 2011 by Katica Locke
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Author's Note
A Solitary Flame is from the same world as Broken Wings and Moonlight. You can find all of these works on FictionPress.com for free, however, they are rough, unedited versions and may be lacking in certain scenes that were added to the final editions. This is an edited and updated version for anyone who would like a clean and neat copy for their preferred electronic reading device.
***
Holding his bags close to himself, Kessex made his way through the crowded corridors of the dormitory, a wrinkled slip of paper clutched in his sweaty hand as he searched for his dorm room. Someone brushed past him and he shrank away, nearly walking into a couple of faeries loitering around outside their room. Hitching the strap of his duffle bag higher onto his shoulder, he ducked as a large, white hawk flew over his head, the downdraft from its powerful wings blowing his shaggy black hair into his eyes. With a upward puff of air, he he blew it out of his face and hurried down the hall, a great sigh of relief rising in his chest as he found room twelve and ducked inside.
Shutting the door behind him, he leaned against it for a moment, closing his eyes as he waited for his heart rate to return to normal. He wasn't too fond of strangers and he hated crowds, so a crowd of strangers was almost more than he could handle. He didn't know what the hell he was thinking coming to Alyrrawood University, the most prestigious and desirable school in the galaxy. Community college would have been fine and he wouldn't have had to take three world gates to get there. He drew a deep breath and sighed as he stepped away from the door. Too late now.
The room was small, maybe fifteen feet square, with two windows looking out over a rolling field, the overcast sky and drifting tendrils of fog making the long grass appear bleak and gray. Beneath each window was a desk, beside each desk sat a bed, and at the foot of each bed stood a dresser. That was all. Kessex supposed that, since he was the first there, the choice of beds was his. Dropping his duffle bag on the floor and setting his suitcase beside it, he walked over and sat upon each mattress, bouncing a little to test out the springs. They seemed to be the same, so he just picked one, lifting his bags onto the bed on the left-hand side of the room and beginning to put his clothes into the dresser.
He was nearly finished unpacking when the door flew open, making him jump as it banged against the doorstop on the inside wall. Kessex's mouth went dry as a young man strode in, carrying two matching suitcases in dark, red leather, a knotted dragon design coiling around the edge of each one, probably embossed in real gold. He wore knee-high black suede boots over tight white jeans, a bright blue button-down shirt tucked into his pants, and a long, tailored black suede coat, but it wasn't his obvious wealth that made Kessex's heart beat a little faster. Indeed, Kessex cared little for material things. It was the strong line of the young man's jaw, the flawless bronze of his skin, the sparkle in his dark brown eyes, the slight wave in his shoulder-length brown hair, streaked with thin bands of gold and copper--He was beautiful. And from the look of him, a fire mage.
Like most mages, Kessex got along best with his own kind, but fire mages were rare when compared to earth and water mages, who made up more than eighty percent of the mage population. The other twenty percent was divided between fire and air mages. Not that Kessex planned on making friends during his stay at the university. He just thought another fire mage would be more likely to respect his privacy.
The stranger stopped in the middle of the room and glanced around, wrinkling his nose at the sparse furnishings, but he smiled as his gaze settled upon Kessex. He set his suitcases upon the floor and pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket, wiping his sweaty hands before extending one of them to Kessex.
"Hello there," he said, his voice deep and rich with a trace of an accent that Kessex couldn't place, but it gave his words a sultry quality. "I'm Dorrance Shaevelle, your new roommate. You can just call me Dor, if you like--Dorrance is quite a mouthful."
Kessex swallowed hard.
"Kessex Imberrin, pleased to meet you," he mumbled, his gaze fixed on Dorrance's shirt as he shook the young man's hand and quickly let go. He turned away, his head spinning as he fumbled about in his suitcase, pulling out a handful of balled-up socks and stepping over to his dresser--anything to put some distance between them. This was so inconvenient.
"Nice to meet you, too," Dorrance said and Kessex could hear the confusion in his voice. He didn't know if he was supposed to respond to that, or what he should say if he did, so he just stared into his dresser, shifting his socks from one side of the drawer to the other and back again. "I don't think I've seen you around here before," Dorrance said after a moment and Kessex could hear him moving around the room--the groan of bedsprings, the click of suitcase latches being released. "Is this your first year at Alyrrawood?"
"Yes," Kessex said. Should he ask Dorrance the same? No, clearly this wasn't his first year. Ask him what year he was in, maybe? Silence stretched after his initial response. Had it been too long since he had spoken? Would a question now seem weird? Would it invite more questions, ones Kessex didn't want to answer? He decided not to say anything.
"Well, if you need any help finding your way around the campus, just ask," Dorrance said a little while later. "I remember how big it seemed last year. It took me a week to stop getting lost on my way to class." He chuckled, a warm, rumbling sound that faded away into the silence. Kessex bit the inside of his lip, worrying it between his teeth. Should he have laughed with him? Kessex moved back to his suitcase, zipping it shut and sliding it underneath his bed. With his unpacking done, he suddenly had nothing to do and found himself staring at his bed, his heart thudding in his ears.
"So you're an earth mage, right?" Dorrance asked, making him jump.
"No," Kessex said, giving his head a small shake as he turned and sat down upon the edge of the bed, folding his hands in his lap as he stared at a dark burn upon the worn wood floor. "Fire."
"Oh, darn," Dorrance said and Kessex glanced at him before looking away again. "Not that I have anything against fire mages," Dorrance added, "I just thought you were an earth mage like me."
Like me? Kessex's eyes darted to the young man again. But...but his hair was gold, copper, and brown, and his eyes were flecked with gold and orange--colors of the autumn leaves. Kessex suddenly felt very stupid. It was just wishful thinking, seeing what he wanted to see. Most mages changed their appearance to fit their areas of expertise. Kessex would have liked to--just some simple gold highlights in his black hair or an orange flicker in his brown eyes--just to fit in better with the other mages, but cosmetic alterations were expensive.
Kessex suddenly realized that he hadn't responded and that he was still staring at Dorrance. He felt his face color, heat rising up his neck into his cheeks as he rose to his feet and headed for the door.
"'Scuse me, I have to go," he muttered, jerking the door open and escaping into the hall. He stood for a moment as a tall guy with dark chocolate skin and a sandy-coated wolf walked past, then he dashed down the hall, emerging into a courtyard, the air chill and clammy on his bare arms. He should have grabbed a jacket, but he hadn't exactly been thinking clearly. He began walking, glancing into the first building he passed, but it was the cafeteria and it appeared to be dinnertime, the long trestle tables crowded with students of every size, color, and shape. He kept walking.
The next door he passed led into a quiet, deserted hallway and he ducked inside, not caring where it went, as long as it was warm and without people. Hands tucked in his jeans pockets, he followed the corridor as it wound through the building, past dark rooms with locked doors--classrooms, he supposed. He passed a stairwell, one side leading up, the other heading down, underground. Must be where the vampires had their classes. He didn't have any vampire studies this term, but he would in the winter. He wasn't looking forward to it.
Reaching the end of the hall, he exited into a short breezeway, the courtyard to the left, a misty, twilit field to the right, and another set of double doors in front of him. Pulling open the doors, he found himself in an official-looking corridor, with administrative offices on either side. He passed the offices of the four advisors--one for mages, one for vampires, one for werefolk, and one for faeries--and then a short hallway that led to the professors' living quarters. In a school with such a diverse population, it was only his bad luck to get stuck in a room with an earth mage. And a chatty one at that.
It wasn't like there were feuds between the different types or anything. Some areas of magic just weren't compatible with others. Fire worked well with air, but not with water or earth. It wasn't a big deal as long as they didn't try to do magic together.
But it wasn't just their powers that were opposites. Kessex had known guys like Dorrance in high school--rich kids with charm and grace, who could have anything they wanted, who looked down upon those who had to work to get where they were, those who hadn't had life handed to them on a silver tray. Kessex hated guys like that.
Turning a corner, Kessex found himself in a wide, marble hallway with gilded doors on either side. A few people were about, talking quietly, most of them carrying books. Could this be?
Kessex walked closer, pulling open one of the golden doors and breathing deep, the scent of leather and parchment and old dust filling the air. It was. With a smile, he slipped into the library. Maybe he'd be able to survive college after all.
***
Ignoring the chatter and bustle all around him, Kessex hunched over his herbalism textbook, getting a head start on the chapter they'd be assigned later that week while he ate his lunch. He had discovered that most people would leave him alone if he looked busy enough. Most people.
"Hi, Kessex," Dorrance said, setting his tray down on the opposite side of the table and taking a seat.
"Hello," Kessex said, not looking up from his book, even though he was suddenly unable to concentrate on his reading. What did Dorrance want? Help with his homework? What else was Kessex good at? Nothing. He glanced across the table as Dorrance dug into a bowl of thick beef stew, for the moment not seeming to want anything. Dorrance looked up from his tray and caught Kessex staring. Kessex turned back to his book, but not before Dorrance shot him a quick smile.
"Whatcha reading?" Dorrance asked. Kessex's mouth was so dry he didn't think he could answer, so he just lifted the book off the table, giving Dorrance a look at the cover. "Ah, herbalism. I got pretty good grades in that class, if you ever need some help."
"Thanks," Kessex said to his book. He didn't need help--he was smart and he studied hard--but even if he did, Dorrance would be the last guy he'd ask. It wasn't like Dorrance was an asshole or anything. Just the opposite, actually. He was always nice and polite and friendly, and that just made everything a hundred times worse. Kessex hadn't been able to make conversation worth a shit before and now that he had this stupid crush? Forget it. He might as well have been mute.
"Hey, Kessex," Dorrance said suddenly and Kessex cringed inwardly. What the hell did he want now? "I was wondering--"
"Dor! There you are!"
"Man, we've been looking everywhere for you."
"Who's your friend?"
Kessex tensed as three of Dorrance's friends walked up and took seats beside them, two of them eyeing Kessex while the third stole crackers off Dorrance's tray.
"Hi, guys," Dorrance said. "This is Kessex, my roommate."
"Nice to meet ya," one of the guys said and then they all three turned their attention to Dorrance, as though Kessex had ceased to exist, for which he was very grateful. He hated people staring at him. The three guys started talking to Dorrance about some sport, telling him about the game he had missed and inviting him to play with them next time. Kessex quietly closed his herbalism book and picked up his tray, slipping away from the table without even being noticed. He dumped what was left of his lunch into the trash and hurried out of the crowded cafeteria. As he reached the exit, he glanced back, where Dorrance was still sitting with his friends, and he was surprised to find Dorrance watching him leave, an unreadable expression on the earth mage's face. Turning away, Kessex tucked his book under his arm and ducked outside.
***
Dorrance was seated in the middle of his bed, books and papers spread all around him, when Kessex walked in after his last class of the day. Kessex kept his eyes on the floor, making his way to his desk and setting his battered leather satchel upon the seat of his chair as he dug out his Language textbook and the notebook with the homework assignment in it.
"Hi, Kessex," Dorrance said and Kessex could feel the older mage's eyes upon him.
"Hello," Kessex said, hanging the satchel over the back of the chair and taking a seat at his desk. He opened his book to chapter seven and tried to read, but he could hear Dorrance rustling papers, could hear the creak of the bedsprings as Dorrance stood up, could hear the young man groan as he stretched. And Kessex could feel him step closer, resting his hands on the back of Kessex's chair.
"Whatcha got there?" Dorrance asked, leaning over Kessex's shoulder. Kessex couldn't move, could barely breathe, the faint, musky scent of Dorrance's body wash making his head spin. "Languages, eh? I got pretty good grades in that class, too, if you want some help, and I'm taking Astaniko this year. Si baroA Ki aA ko dh'lamar kh'isi. Si kexafA eh'nir Kur."
Kessex had no idea what Dorrance just said, but his voice, his accent, his proximity, his smell--Kessex grabbed his books off the desk and pushed his chair back, holding the books in front of his crotch to hide the sudden bulge in his jeans as he hurried past his roommate, muttering something about studying in the library. Dorrance caught up with him at the door and grabbed his arm, holding him back.
"Kessex, please, don't leave," he said and Kessex stopped, staring at the closed door, his heart pounding. "What did I do? Please, I want to know. We've been roommates for a month and a half and it's like you can't stand to be around me. You won't speak to me, you won't even look at me. I want to be your friend, but...What did I do?"
What did he do? Aside from being completely charming and gorgeous and wonderful, nothing, but Kessex could hardly tell him that. He stood, mouth dry and mind racing, trying to think of something, anything, any lie at all that didn't make him sound stupid, but every thought that flitted through his head was dumber than the last. Finally, Dorrance sighed and let him go.
"Didn't mean to bother you," Dorrance said, turning and walking away, back to his bed. Kessex opened his mouth, wanting to say something, but nothing came out. After a moment, he opened the door and stepped into the hall, pulling it shut behind him. He was shaking inside, a chill racing over his clammy skin as he headed out of the dormitory building and across the courtyard to the library.
That was just about his worst nightmare--being confronted and being unable to speak. The only thing that was missing was he wasn't naked. How was he ever going to face Dorrance again?
***
Kessex woke with a stiff neck, the overstuffed armchairs in the back half of the library not nearly as comfortable as they had looked from across the room. Still, he supposed it was better than being grilled by Dorrance again. Or worse, Dorrance not speaking at all. Would that really be worse? Kessex chewed his bottom lip as he gathered up his satchel and glanced at the clock on the wall. Seven-thirty. Dorrance would be at breakfast. If Kessex hurried, he could slip into their room for a change of clothes. He needed a shower before class.
Yes, he decided as he entered the dormitory, it would be worse if Dorrance wouldn't talk to him. That would mean he was angry. Kessex wouldn't have cared a bit if Dorrance had simply ignored him from day one, but the thought of having anyone angry at him made his stomach churn. Holding his breath, Kessex opened the door to their room and slipped inside, letting it all out in a rush when he found the room empty, his bed neatly made and Dorrance's comforter hanging half on the floor, as usual.
Dropping his satchel onto his bed, he quickly shoved the books he would need for that day's classes inside, hesitating as he picked up his Language textbook. What was it that Dorrance had said to him? He remembered the words dilaman kh'isi and eh'nir, or something that sounded close. He flipped through the small Alau to Astaniko dictionary in the back of the book. He didn't find dilaman but he scanned the list, finding dh'lamar instead, only that couldn't have been what Dorrance said. Dh'lamar meant handsome. k'hisi meant mage, which was reasonable, but he must have misheard eh'nir, too. It meant to kiss. Shaking his head, Kessex shoved the book into his satchel and gathered up a clean pair of jeans, briefs, and a T-shirt.
There were only a couple of guys in the bathroom, one that Kessex recognized from his Languages class, but neither paid him any attention as he undressed, placing his clothes on a shelf beside the long row of sinks. Hanging his towel on a hook outside a shower stall, Kessex closed the curtain behind him and turned on the water, groaning softly as the hot water cascaded over his body. He stood for a moment, one hand on the tiled wall, his eyes closed as he let the spray beat against his shoulders and the back of his neck, easing the tightness from his muscles.
What the hell was he going to do? He couldn't spend the next year hiding in the library, avoiding his roommate. Request a room change? Not without a damn good reason. Drop out and go home? It was where he belonged, but his mother would be so disappointed. They had all worked so hard, sacrificed so much, so that he could go to the best university--It would kill her if he threw it all away over something so stupid. He was just going to have to figure something out, come up with something to get Dorrance off his back.
Grabbing a squirt of cheap shampoo out of the dispenser on the wall, he began to wash his hair, his eyes squeezed shut to keep the soap out of them. Something to get Dorrance off his back...He could feel the young mage leaning over him again, hands on the back of Kessex's chair, so close--Kessex pressed his lips together as the shower spray danced over his stiffening cock. He couldn't stop himself from imagining how good it would feel to have Dorrance standing behind him, strong arms wrapped around Kessex's waist, hands working up and down the length of Kessex's shaft. Kessex quickly rinsed the soap from his hair and wrapped his own hand around himself. Jerking off in a public bathroom made his face burn, even though no one could see him and no one would ever know, but he couldn't exactly leave the shower with a raging hard-on, could he?
His breath quickened as he stroked himself, touching all the places he liked, and it didn't take long for him to erupt onto the beige tiles and dribble all down the back of his hand, a single low moan escaping him. He watched the shower spray wash the mess down the drain and then shut off the water, rubbing his hands together as he listened for a snicker or some other sign that he'd been heard. Nothing except the everyday sound of someone brushing their teeth. He breathed a quiet sigh of relief and grabbed his towel from outside the stall, tousling his shaggy hair before rubbing himself dry and wrapping the towel around his waist. Shoving the curtain back, he stepped out into the room and froze, Dorrance standing before the sink, his toothbrush in his hand as his reflection stared at Kessex.
Dorrance leaned down and spat toothpaste foam into the sink.
"Hi, Kessex," he said, an unusual edge to his voice. Kessex couldn't breathe. Had he heard--"Have fun in there?" the earth mage asked and Kessex felt his face burn. He glanced at his reflection, his normally tan skin beet red from his brow to halfway down his chest. "Were you thinking about your girlfriend?" Dorrance asked, turning around. Girlfriend? "I bet you must miss her terribly. It must be awful to be stuck here at an all-male school. That's it, isn't it? You don't like guys, do you? C'mon, Kessex, you can tell me. I can handle it."
Kessex didn't know what the hell was happening, why Dorrance suddenly thought he liked girls, and he didn't want to find out. Leaving his clothes on their shelf, he ran out of the bathroom, clutching at the towel wrapped around his waist.
"Kessex, wait!" Dorrance called after him, but he couldn't have stopped himself if he had wanted to. He almost barreled into several people as he dashed down the hall, their angry shouts and jeering laughter following him into his room. He slammed the door and dove at his dresser, grabbing another pair of jeans and jerking them on, careful not to catch his dick in the zipper. He pulled on a T-shirt, grabbing his shoes in one hand and his satchel in the other as he turned toward the door.
It opened before he reached it and he drew back as Dorrance walked in, Kessex's pile of clothes tucked under his arm.
"You forgot these," Dorrance said, tossing them onto Kessex's bed. "Look, I'm sorry about that and I'm sorry if I make you uncomfortable, but I don't know what to do. I like you and I want to be friends. I don't care if you only like girls--that's your choice and I'm okay with that. Just tell me what I can do so that you'll sleep in your own room again and I can stop feeling like an ogre for chasing you away."
Kessex swallowed hard.
"I-I-I don't...just like girls," Kessex muttered, looking down at Dorrance's shoes.
"Well, that's a relief," Dorrance said. Kessex didn't know how to respond to that, so he said nothing. After a moment, Dorrance cleared his throat. "So, I was thinking...Some of the graduate students are having a party up on the top floor tonight and I know a few of the guys. Maybe you'd like to go hang out for a while?"
"I don't like parties," Kessex said, still speaking to Dorrance's sneakers. A long silence filled the room and Kessex shifted his weight from one foot to the other, worrying the strap of his satchel between his fingers as he tried to think of something else to say.
"Nobody doesn't like parties," Dorrance said at last, his voice quiet. "They just don't like going to parties with certain people. If you want me to leave you alone, Kessex, just say so." Kessex's eyes darted to the door. He wanted out of there. He wanted this to be over. He just didn't know how to make it end. When he didn't speak, Dorrance said, "I don't know if that means you don't want me to leave you alone, or if you just can't stand to talk to me. I'm trying really hard here to understand. It would be nice if you could try a little, too." He started toward the door.
"Fine," Kessex said, his own voice startling him. "I'll try. I mean, I'll go...to the party...with you." His heart was racing. Did he really just say that? Dorrance turned toward him and Kessex glanced up, his gaze lingering on the earth mage's bright eyes before dropping to his full lips. What would it be like to kiss him? Kessex blushed at the thought and looked away.
"Holy shit," Dorrance whispered and Kessex froze. Had he said something wrong? Had Dorrance correctly interpreted the look on his face? He forced his gaze back up to Dorrance's handsome face and found the young mage smiling. "You're shy, aren't you?" Kessex looked back at the floor as he felt his face heat up again. It only got worse when Dorrance laughed. "Great Maele, that's it; you're shy."
It was happening again. Now the mocking would start, the teasing, the name-calling. His fists clenched, Kessex stepped toward the door. Dorrance grabbed his arm and pulled him back, and it was all he could do not to take a swing at his roommate.
"Hang on, Kessex," Dorrance said. "I'm not laughing at you. I'm just relieved. I thought you hated me and I couldn't figure out why." He seemed to realize that he was holding on to Kessex's arm and let go. "You'll still come to the party, right? You can meet a few of my friends and we can get to know each other. I'll do all the talking, I promise." Kessex took a slow breath, trying to get his pounding heart under control, and licked his dry lips.
"Yeah, okay," he said with a slight nod. He could deal with a few guys, he could listen to Dorrance talk. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if he wasn't expected to say anything. That was a horrible feeling--knowing the other person expected a response and not being able to think of anything to say. Maybe this would be okay.
"Great," Dorrance said. "I'll meet you here after your last class. There's going to be a ton of food so we can skip dinner...if that's okay with you."
"Yeah, okay," Kessex said, glancing at the clock on the wall. "I gotta go."
"Sure," Dorrance said. "Me too. But you might want to take a minute to put your shoes on before you go." Kessex looked down at his sneakers clutched in his hand and then tossed his satchel onto his bed as he fetched a pair of socks out of his drawer. Maybe this would be okay.
***
Kessex arrived at their room first and was busy emptying his satchel onto his desk, sorting through textbooks and making a pile of the homework he had due next week, when Dorrance swept in, tossed his book bag onto his bed, and ran a comb back though his long hair.
"You ready?" Dorrance asked. Kessex looked from Dorrance to himself. He had contemplated changing his clothes, but he didn't know what sort of attire would be expected. Dorrance was just wearing his everyday jeans and the blue shirt Kessex had first seen him in under that elegant black coat that hung to his knees and hugged his frame like a glove. Kessex was wearing a gray T-shirt and faded jeans, and his only jacket had belonged to his father--it was too broad through the shoulders--so he left it in the drawer. He didn't know why he'd need a coat anyway, they were just going upstairs.
"Yeah," Kessex said, nodding. He tucked his hands in his pockets to dry the sweat from his palms and to stop them from shaking as he followed Dorrance out into the hall. Neither of them spoke as they walked to the elevator and waited for the doors to open. It wasn't until they stepped off on the sixth floor that Dorrance spoke again.
"Thank for coming with me," the earth mage said. "My friends always tease me when I show up at a party alone and I know we're not...you know...or anything, but it's nice to have a date for once." Kessex had to fight to keep the pink from rising to his cheeks at the word date. Was this a date? Would he be expected to hold hands and make out? He ran his tongue across the front of his teeth. He should have brushed. Maybe he had a mint or some gum. He searched his pockets as he followed Dorrance down the hall, but found nothing.
As they neared the end of the corridor, Kessex could hear laughter coming from behind the farthest door, and a deep, bass beat thumped inside his chest. Music? Would Dorrance want to dance? Kessex was starting to think this was a really bad idea after all. He opened his mouth to tell Dorrance that he'd changed his mind, but the door ahead of them flew open and three guys stumbled out, laughing as they caught themselves on the wall and each other. Kessex recognized them as the three guys who came to sit by Dorrance that day at lunch. One of them caught sight of Dorrance and pulled away from the other two.
"Dor, glad you came, man," he said, walking over and throwing his arm across Dorrance's shoulders, pulling him away from Kessex. "C'mon, Medrion brought beer and we're going to start battling the sunflowers we've been growing." Kessex watched Dorrance walk away, following his friends through the door. He stood for a moment, unsure what to do, then started to turn away.
"Hey, where are you going?" Dorrance asked, standing in the doorway when Kessex glanced back. "The party's in here. C'mon, I need your help with something."
"Me?" Kessex asked. What help could he be to anyone, let alone Dorrance? And why would Dorrance need help, anyway? He followed the earth mage into the apartment. It was hot and noisy and more crowded than he'd thought it would be. A couple dozen guys were milling around, talking, laughing, dancing, drinking, eating pizza and chips and hunks of a three foot long sandwich. His mouth suddenly dry, Kessex followed close to Dorrance as his roommate wove through the bodies, leading him deep into the large suite.
In the kitchen, a crowd was gathered around the table, cheering, jeering, and laughing as two, three-foot tall miniature sunflowers beat the shit out of each other, swaying and striking like serpents, leaves clawing and grasping, each trying to tear the petals out of the other. At each end of the table sat a young man--earth mages, Kessex guessed--their brows furrowed in concentration, sweat gleaming on their foreheads, their hands flat upon the wooden surface glowing softly with the light of their magic as they controlled the sunflowers. Bits of bright yellow-orange petal rained down upon the table top until one was able to grab the other and knock it and the plastic pot it was in over.
The victor looked like hell, broken and tattered, and the mage controlling it staggered as he stood, his face pale, but he was given a couple of coins and helped over to a sofa as the table was cleared and two new competitors were brought out.
"Hey, Dor," somebody called, "you're next."
Kessex stiffened as Dorrance placed a hand on his arm and leaned close.
"Do me a favor and stand right here," he said, pushing Kessex through the onlookers to stand at the corner of the table. "Don't go anywhere." Kessex looked over at the strangers on either side of him, older guys that he didn't know, and his heart began to pound. He glanced back at Dorrance, but the earth mage had disappeared. Panic rushed through him, swift and sharp and he frantically searched the crowd.
"Kessex, over here," he heard Dorrance say and he turned back to the table, breathing a sigh of relief at the sight of Dorrance sitting at the far end. The handsome earth mage smiled at him and he felt himself blush as he quickly looked down at the table.
"All right, mages, takes your places," said a tall young man with short blue hair, probably a water mage. Another guy sat down across from Dorrance and they both placed their hands on the table. Kessex felt the short hairs on the back of his neck stand on end as the hum of magic filled the air, dancing over his skin. Dorrance's hands began to glow, a warm, red-gold color that matched the flecks in his eyes.
With a start, Kessex realized that Dorrance was staring at him. Not just looking--staring--with a heat and intensity that made Kessex squirm.
"Get ready..." the tall water mage said. "Go!" Kessex turned his attention to the fight as Dorrance's sunflower struck like a cobra, the petals wrapping around the head of the other flower as the stalk twisted. People gasped and jumped back as the other flower was flipped clean off the table.
"Holy shit, Dor! Way to go!" several people said as Dorrance rose to his feet, grinning and thanking the guys who patted him on the back and accepting his winnings before moving through the crowd to Kessex's side.
"Wow," Kessex said as they walked away from the table. "That was...Wow."
"That was all thanks to you," Dorrance said. Before Kessex had a chance to ask what he meant, he pointed toward another room, where lights flashed and flickered beyond the open doorway. "C'mon, I want you to meet someone." Kessex followed close behind as Dorrance led him into a bedroom where five or six guys were sprawled on a huge bed, two of them playing video games on a television screen that took up most of the wall while the rest watched.
"Hey, Zaiden," Dorrance said. "I want you to meet somebody." One of the spectators climbed off the bed, running a hand back through his short, scarlet hair, his eyes flickering like live coals. "Zaiden, this is Kessex, a fire mage like you."
"Like me, huh?" Zaiden said with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. He looked Kessex over from head to foot before extending his hand. "Nice to meet you."
"You, too," Kessex muttered, reaching out to shake his hand. He jerked back as a ball of blue-white flame erupted from Zaiden's palm. The red-headed mage laughed.
"Just messing with you," Zaiden said, but he let his hand fall back to his side. "What sort of tricks do you have up your sleeve?" Kessex didn't have any tricks, as he thought magic to precious and costly to waste showing off, but there was one thing he could do that had always impressed his teachers.
Holding his hand out flat, palm up, Kessex concentrated on the power within him, relaxing that tight knot he always carried in the middle of his chest, allowing the magic to run though his veins. Magic fed on emotion, the stronger the better, and as Kessex replayed that morning though his mind, remembering how it felt to step out of the shower and find Dorrance there, listening, he felt his face burn and the energy pulse through his body, like the beat of a second heart beside his own. His hand began to glow, a violet shimmer dancing over his skin, and then a single, solitary flame appeared, a four inch tall tongue of fire hovering just above his palm.
Zaiden made a snorting noise, apparently not impressed. Kessex ignored him, looking instead at Dorrance, letting his gaze move slowly over the earth mage's body, letting the rest of the world fade away. He heard a quiet murmur from somewhere and he glanced at the flame out of the corner of his eye. It had taken on the shape of a human figure, the face devoid of features, but the long hair and long coat left little question as to who the inspiration was.
"That's amazing," Dorrance said, leaning down to take a closer look. The figure on Kessex's palm bent over, too, mimicking his actions, and Dorrance gasped in surprise. "Look at that," he said, grinning as he raised his arm and waved. Kessex smiled, watching Dorrance make strange gestures just to see the flame do the same. Someone chuckled and Kessex suddenly became aware that the video game had been forgotten, everyone in the room standing around watching him. The room got very hot and he found it hard to breathe.
A cold prickle, like having his hand dunked in a bucket of ice water, rushed up his arm and the flickering figure on his hand exploded, showering the nearest people with sparks and throwing a ball of fire into the middle of Kessex's chest. The flames licked at his T-shirt, the heat stinging his eyes as he stared down at himself, unable to move. Dorrance leaped forward, swatting at the fire, his hand pounding on Kessex's chest as he beat the flames out. Smoke hung above them in a cloud and someone hurried over to open the windows before it set off the alarms.
"Cute trick," Zaiden said, a small, smug smile on his face. "What do you do for an encore?" Kessex wanted to die. He turned, his heart pounding, and pushed through the crowd that had gathered around them. He had to get out of there. He couldn't breathe. He was almost to the door when a strong hand grabbed his wrist.
"Kessex, wait," Dorrance said, trying to pull him back. This time, Kessex refused.
"I have to get out of here," he said. "I-I don't belong here." Dorrance let go, but followed him out into the hall.
"Are you okay?" Dorrance asked, stepping in front of him as Kessex leaned against the wall near the stairwell, trying to catch his breath. "Did you get burned?" Kessex shook his head. "What happened? Did you get distracted?" Kessex shook his head again.
"Someone did that," he said. "I felt their magic." He flexed his fingers, trying to shake off the chill of another mage's power. He had a pretty good idea who it was, too, but he didn't want to say anything bad about one of Dorrance's friends.
"Zaiden. That son-of-a-bitch," Dorrance said, looking back at the closed door, where it sounded like the party was continuing without pause. He turned back to Kessex. "I'm sorry, I should have known better than to introduce you to him. He can be a real asshole, but I thought since you were both fire mages that he might behave himself. I guess I was wrong. Are you sure you're okay?" Kessex nodded, but couldn't speak as Dorrance reached out, trailing his fingertips over the black scorch-mark on his shirt. Dorrance's gaze shifted upward, to Kessex's face, and he drew his hand back. For a moment, they just stared at each other, Kessex's heart pounding. What was Dorrance thinking? What was he going to do? Should Kessex say something?
"Are you hungry?" Dorrance asked suddenly, taking a step backward. "I'm starving. Stay here; I'll be right back." Kessex opened his mouth, but nothing came out as Dorrance rushed off, back into the party. Standing alone in the hall, he looked down at his shirt, then ran his hands back through his shaggy hair. What the hell had happened? Or almost happened. He wasn't sure if it was just him or if that had been unusually awkward. It was almost like...but no, that was absurd. Why would Dorrance want to kiss him?
After several minutes, Dorrance returned carrying a paper plate piled with slices of pizza in one hand and two plastic cups in the other.
"Here," he said, holding the plate out to Kessex.
"I'm not hungry," Kessex said.
Dorrance grinned.
"Okay, but could you take it anyway? I don't want to spill the punch." Kessex flushed and quickly took the plate from Dorrance. He started to head down the hall toward the elevator. "Hang on, there's something I want to show you," Dorrance said, motioning for Kessex to follow as he began climbing the stairs. Kessex just wanted to go back to his room and forget this night ever happened, but he was still holding Dorrance's pizza. After a brief hesitation, he hurried after the older mage.
The stairs ended at a door and as Kessex caught up, Dorrance pushed the door open with his elbow, letting a cool, damp gust of air race past them. They emerged from the stairwell onto the roof, the stars glittering in the rich, velvet black night sky above them. Kessex stopped for a moment and just stared. He couldn't remember ever having seen the stars above the university before--Alyrrawood was constantly draped in a thick blanket of fog--and the familiar constellations of his home world were nowhere to be found.
"Kessex, over here," Dorrance called. Kessex joined him at the edge of the roof, setting the plate of pizza down on the ledge and accepting one of the plastic cups. He stood, staring down into the pink, carbonated beverage as Dorrance took one of the slices of pizza and began to eat. Dorrance had said he would do all the talking, but the silence still screamed at Kessex, demanding that he fill it, and he licked his dry lips nervously.
"So...where are you from?" he asked finally, trying to ignore the pounding in his chest. Dorrance finished chewing, swallowed, and took a drink of his punch.
"That sounds like a bad pick-up line," he said with a chuckle. Kessex glanced away, raising his cup to his lips and sipping the sweet, fruity drink to hide his embarrassment. He should have kept his stupid mouth shut. Dorrance didn't seem to notice his discomfort. "I'm from Ashael, just outside Greater Kormunae," the earth mage said. "How about you?"
"Oh, I-I--" Kessex wanted to shoot himself. Of course Dorrance would ask a reciprocal question--that's how conversations were supposed to go. "I'm from Siva Delta, on Nethmalon."
"Ooh, a city boy," Dorrance said with a grin. "I passed through Siva Delta on my way here, but I never left the gating complex. I looked out the windows, though. That place is huge." Kessex nodded. He had done the same when he gated in from Minori. He hated lying, but there was no way he was going to tell Dorrance that he'd grown up on a ranch colony at the ass-end of the galaxy. "Yeah, my father owns a few hundred thousand acres. There's a vineyard on part of it and he rents the rest to farmers and ranchers. What's your father do?"
"He's dead," Kessex said, relieved that he didn't have to make something up.
"Oh," Dorrance said, his voice barely louder than a whisper. "I'm sorry."
"It was a long time ago," Kessex said, taking another drink of his punch. His father had been shot by rustlers trying to steal the rancher's cattle when Kessex was only seven. He barely remembered him.
"Still...I'm sorry." Kessex nodded and another long, heavy silence settled between them, but this time Kessex kept his mouth shut, sipping his drink whenever he felt the need to do something. The wind blowing in off the ocean was chilly and Kessex shivered, shoving one hand deep into his pocket as he pulled his arms close to his body. "Are you cold?" Dorrance asked after a while.
"No," Kessex said, shaking his head even as he shivered. He didn't want to go back downstairs. He didn't want to return to the party, and...he was enjoying this quiet time with Dorrance, even with the awkward moments. Tilting his head back, he looked up at the stars, a few thin, wispy clouds drifting high overhead. In the silence, he could just hear--possibly--the very faint whisper of the waves crashing against the rocky shore a few hundred yards from campus.
"You look cold," Dorrance said and Kessex glanced at him as the earth mage sidled closer, standing shoulder to should with Kessex for a moment before raising his arm and draping it around Kessex's shoulders. Kessex tensed at the touch, his heart beginning to pound again, and his skin grew hot. He was thankful it was too dark for Dorrance to see what color he had turned. "Is this okay?" Dorrance asked. "I mean, you said you don't just like girls...Does that mean you also like guys?"
Kessex swallowed hard.
"Yeah," he whispered and took another quick drink of his punch. Was Dorrance getting at something or was he just being friendly? Common sense said he was just being nice, just making conversation--Why would a wealthy, handsome guy like Dorrance be interested in a freak like Kessex? And yet, he found himself wishing it could something more.
"Are you seeing anybody now?" Kessex couldn't answer, except to shake his head. Strange, that simple motion made his head spin and he had to set his cup down on the ledge to brace his hands on the cold bricks. "Are you okay?" Dorrance asked, the arm about Kessex's shoulders tightening.
"I...feel strange..." Kessex said. He was suddenly hot, his clothes too tight, making his skin ache. "What...what's going on?"
"Someone must have spiked the punch," Dorrance said, picking up Kessex's cup and pouring the remaining liquid off the edge of the roof before stacking the two cups together. He took hold of Kessex's arm and turned him toward the stairs. "C'mon, let's go back to our room."
Kessex staggered beside Dorrance, leaning on the strong young mage as they made their way down the stairs and into the elevator. It was so hot and stuffy in the little car, Kessex began pulling at his shirt, trying to take it off over his head. He couldn't breathe.
"Easy, Kessex," Dorrance said, pushing his arms back down. "Not here, not yet. We're almost there. You'll feel better once you lay down."
"It's so hot," Kessex said, panting. "I-I hurt..." His hands slid down his chest, the pressure of his own touch chasing the ache from his skin, and he whimpered as his palms rubbed over the bulge in his jeans. When had he gotten so hard?
"It'll be okay," Dorrance said. "I'll take care of you." The elevator doors opened and Dorrance pulled him out into the hall, one arm around Kessex's waist as they made their way to their room. Kessex looked up at him, the harsh overhead lights making the gold in his hair sparkle like sunbeams.
"You're so nice," Kessex said and Dorrance glanced at him, his warm eyes glittering. "I'm sorry I never told you before, I just...I like you so much. You're funny and handsome and nice and...handsome, and you have so many friends. I knew I didn't have a chance of being good enough for you and-and I didn't want to look like an idiot. Like any more of an idiot than I usually do."
"You don't look like an idiot," Dorrance said, his voice quiet as he opened the door to their room and helped Kessex inside. They stumbled over to Kessex's bed where Kessex fell upon the mattress like a sack of potatoes. Dorrance lifted his legs onto the bed and pulled off Kessex's shoes, his hands working swiftly to peel Kessex's shirt up and off over his head. Leaning over him, Dorrance placed one soft hand against Kessex's cheek. "Just relax. Try to get some sleep. It'll wear off in a few hours." Dorrance turned away, dropping the two cups and the leftover pizza in the trash beside his desk before stepping over to his bed and flipping the covers back.
Kessex watched him undress, low moans sticking in his throat as he ran his hands over his hot, aching skin, his gaze sliding down Dorrance's bare back, lingering on his silky black boxers, the material doing little to hide the firm, sculpted muscle beneath. Kessex unbuttoned his pants, his fingers fumbling with the zipper.
"Dor..." Kessex whispered. "Dorrance, please." The earth mage seemed to hesitate, his movements slow when he looked over his shoulder.
"Do you need a hand there, Kessex?" he asked, staring for a long minute before crossing the room. Kessex reached up toward him, his fingers brushing Dorrance's chest as Dorrance leaned over him. Dorrance gently pushed his hand away and unzipped his pants, the fleeting touch making Kessex raise his hips off the bed, a soft cry escaping him as Dorrance worked his jeans down. "Whoa, you're not wearing underwear," Dorrance said, turning his face away, but that didn't stop the dark silk of his boxers from growing taut across the front. "There you go," Dorrance said, dropping the jeans on the floor. He started back toward his bed.
"Don't--Dor, don't go," Kessex said, struggling to sit up, to get up, to stop him. "I-I need--I need..."
Dorrance made an exasperated sound.
"What, Kessex? What do you need now?"
"I...need you." Kessex reached out, grabbed Dorrance's wrist, and drew the reluctant mage toward him. "I need you. My body aches for you. I want you so much; I've wanted you since I first met you."
Dorrance stopped at the side of the bed, resisting when Kessex tried to pull him down onto the mattress.
"Kessex, you don't know what you're saying," Dorrance said, brushing Kessex's shaggy hair out of his eyes. "This is just the drugs talking--You just have to ignore it."
"No, it isn't," Kessex said, using Dorrance to pull himself to his feet. The earth mage didn't move as Kessex stepped into him, Kessex's hard cock pressing against the cool silk covering Dorrance's thigh, their chests touching as Dorrance's ragged breath fell upon the side of Kessex's neck. "I want you...I want you inside of me." He felt Dorrance shudder against him and the elder mage made no move to stop him as Kessex's hands found the waistband of his boxers, pushing the black silk down off Dorrance's hips. A soft whisper filled the silent room as they slid down Dorrance's legs, pooling around his ankles. "Dor, please..."
"You're going to hate me in the morning," Dorrance murmured, but he closed the distance between them, his strong arms wrapping around Kessex's lean body. "You're going to hate me so much." Kessex gasped, his mouth opening as Dorrance's lips pressed against his own, Dorrance's tongue sliding across his, exploring his mouth. Dorrance tasted like pizza.
Kessex pulled away, out of breath as he turned and bent over his bed, pushing his ass toward Dorrance.
"Please...please..." Kessex said, his legs shaking. He wanted it so much he hurt, and when Dorrance ran his hand down Kessex's hip, the young fire mage moaned, his eyes sliding shut as Dorrance's hands moved across his skin, caressing the back of his thigh, the small of his back, the curve of his butt.
"Lie down," Dorrance said, pushing gently on his back, urging him onto his stomach on the mattress. Kessex raised his head, a sinking feeling sucking the bottom out of his stomach as he watched Dorrance walk away, but the earth mage only went as far as his dresser, returning in a moment with a small glass jar filled with a pale green gel. Kessex drew his knees up under him, raising his ass into the air and spreading his legs as Dorrance opened the jar. The cool, fresh scent of mint and aloe filled the room as Dorrance dipped his fingers into the jar. Kessex wrapped his arms around his pillow, trembling inside as Dorrance rubbed his cold, slick fingertips across Kessex's entrance, pushing slowly inside him.
"Oh...yes...yes..." Kessex whispered as Dorrance eased two, then three fingers inside, stretching him, filling him. It felt so good, but he needed more.
"Man, that shit really works," Dorrance said, working his three fingers in and out of Kessex. "You're already so loose." He pulled out and climbed onto the bed, one hand rubbing along Kessex's backbone as he guided himself to Kessex's opening with the other. Kessex arched his back, a throaty sound of desperation and need escaping him as Dorrance slid inside, hot and hard, filling him completely.
"Fuck...fuck me," Kessex said, rocking back, trying to force Dorrance deeper. Dorrance grabbed his hips, withdrawing slowly before thrusting back in. Unimagined pleasure exploded within Kessex and he cried out, his fingers digging into his mattress as his hips bucked. Dorrance leaned over him, hands creeping up his sides, lips playing along his spine, Dorrance finding a steady rhythm that made Kessex see stars. "Never...knew," Kessex gasped, his words muffled by his pillow. "Never knew it felt this good."
A heaviness formed inside him, low in his gut, throbbing and shuddering, sending sharp splinters of pleasure shooting straight to his nuts, his cock aching, the head rubbing against his bed, leaving a wet smear of pre-come on the comforter. That weight grew tighter, the pleasure electric, and each breath was just one helpless noise after another. Dorrance's breath fell fast and hard between his shoulder blades, the earth mage's thrusts growing short and urgent.
Suddenly, Dorrance cried out, pressing his forehead to Kessex's back as his hips jerked erratically, his hands clutching at Kessex's chest as he filled Kessex with a slippery warmth. Dorrance grew still and quiet, just his ragged breathing filling the silence. Kessex lay there, Dorrance on top of him, arms wrapped around him, his body still aching, blood screaming through his veins.
"Dor?" he asked, a slight whimper in his voice.
"Shhh; it's okay," Dorrance said. "I didn't forget about you." He kissed Kessex's shoulder and slid his hands down Kessex's body, one cupping his balls as the other wrapped around his shaft. He began to rock his hips, his softening cock still buried deep inside Kessex, and Kessex arched against him in careless abandon, his jaw hanging slack as he trembled and bucked into Dorrance's hands.
"Oh! Oh, Dorrance!" he cried as the earth mage lifted him to the heights of ecstasy and flung him into the depths of oblivion.
***
His mouth dry and gummy, Kessex licked his lips as he opened his eyes, blinking away the film that blurred his vision. He lay there for a moment, staring across the room at Dorrance's empty, unmade bed. It was early, the light filtering in through his window pearly gray, and it was a weekend--So where was Dorrance? He remembered something about a party...
Kessex shivered, the chill air moving across his bare skin, and he looked down at himself, lying naked on top of his covers. What the hell? He glanced at Dorrance's bed again, suddenly glad his roommate was absent. He might not be gone long, though, and the thought being caught in such a compromising position made Kessex's cheeks burn.
He tried to sit up, but barely got his head off the pillow before he had to stop, wincing as a sharp spike of pain shot through his head, like a nail being driven right between his eyes. He groaned and pressed his fingertips between his knitted brows, but the headache faded almost as swiftly as it had appeared. Was it a hangover? He couldn't remember drinking, but...he couldn't remember much of anything about the previous night. A little unnerved, he finished sitting up.
"Where you going?"
Kessex leaped out of bed, his heart nearly stopping as he whirled around and found Dorrance lying in his bed, stark naked, a confused look on his face as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes with the back of one hand.
"Wh-what--Where are your clothes?" Kessex asked, averting his eyes. He realized that he was still nude as well and quickly grabbed something off the floor to wear. For a moment he didn't recognize the black boxers in his hands, then he threw them at Dorrance and picked up his jeans, nearly falling over as he struggled into them.
"Oh, shit," Dorrance said, scrambling off Kessex's bed. "Kessex, I'm sorry. I didn't mean for this to happen."
"For this...What happened?" Kessex asked, running his hands back through his disheveled hair. "What did we do?"
"You don't remember?" Dorrance said slowly and a funny look flitted across his features. Kessex shook his head, his gaze dropping to Dorrance's cock before he jerked his eyes away again. He swallowed hard.
"Could you put something on, please?" he said, his voice strained. His heart was racing, his hands shaking as he turned away. "I-I remember the party..."
"We didn't stay long," Dorrance said and Kessex could hear the rustle of cloth as he got dressed. "We went up onto the roof and talked for a while. We brought along some pizza and punch from the party. Someone must have spiked the punch; you started feeling strange." Kessex nodded as Dorrance spoke, the events coming back to him as Dorrance described them, but it was like a distant memory, disconnected somehow, almost like it had happened to someone else. "I brought you back here," Dorrance continued. "I tried to get you to go to sleep, but...you begged me..."
"Maele have mercy," Kessex whispered, closing his eyes as a wave of shame washed over him, his face and neck burning, his stomach twisting up into a cold knot. He couldn't breathe. Grabbing his T-shirt off the floor, Kessex headed for the door, but Dorrance's strong hands pulled him back.
"Kessex, please, don't go," Dorrance said, grabbing his arm when he tried to pull away. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have, but you wanted me to--" Kessex squeezed his eyes shut, pressing his hands over his ears as he jerked away from Dorrance.
"Stop, please," he said. Like he wanted to hear what a whore he'd turned into. "I-I just need some air," he mumbled, yanking the door open and fleeing into the hall. He pulled his T-shirt on as he walked, his bare feet pounding on the thin, worn carpet. This couldn't be happening. He had to be dreaming. It was some kind of nightmare, he just had to wake up now. Kessex turned the corner, heading for the outside doors, and nearly crashed into someone heading the opposite direction.
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